In the wake of teen suicides nationwide, it's easy to wonder where these teens can turn. For the first time that I can recall, pop radio may hold the answer.
OK, I may be putting pop songs on a pedestal, but pop stars are releasing songs that people can dance and sing along with but also encourage young people who are bullied without being schmaltzy. And while these are not the newest themes, as Christina Aguilera and Cyndi Lauper would be quick to remind you, this is the first time I've seen a recurring theme of singles and album tracks that are directed at bullied youth (and LGBT ones in particular.)
That naughty trash-pop minx Ke$ha tells Entertainment Weekly that her mini-album Cannibal's lead single "We R Who We R" is intended to be a pride anthem, a "celebration of any sort of quirks or eccentricities." It's also a lot of fun to dance to, as well:
Meanwhile, Katy Perry's tumultuous relationship with the gay community takes a turn for the better with the "Fireworks" - a Jack Kerouac-referencing ditty of empowerment, with boys kissing in the video:
Over in P!nk's world, one of two news songs included on the US release of her Greatest Hits... So Far!!! album is "Raise Your Glass." Besides quoting the Joker, this anthem for underdogs and sundry other "dirty little freaks" continues P!nk's strong commitment to gay rights. She performs the song at a gay wedding in the video for the song:
The Facebook Generation's songwriter of record, Taylor Swift includes the song "Mean" on her platinum-selling disc Speak Now. It's a simple tale of childhood bullies left in the dust as Taylor goes on to selling a million-plus CDs in a week. "Someday I'll be big enough that you can't hit me" the country-pop cutie sings, and I pray that troubles kids are singing along. Because it's true!
I'm still on the fence about Eminem and Lil' Wayne's Haddaway-sampling single "No Love" The video is heartbreaking, but as usual Wayne and Em can't control their potty-mouth, including both racial and homosexual slurs in the rhymes. Thoughts?
Let's clean our ears out with some very positive music from Broadway cast members! The proceeds from the iTunes downloads of "It Gets Better" directly benefits The Trevor Project, the only national suicide prevention hotline for LGBT youth. It's very inspirational and catchy, too!
And we cannot forget the classics, Cyndi Lauper's "True Colors" has been a source of inspiration for gay people for years. In support of the "It Gets Better" project, the Gay Men's Chorus of Los Angeles performed the song. Truly beautiful!
Of course, you know Lady Gaga will be weighing in soon...
Showing posts with label Gay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gay. Show all posts
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Sunday, October 31, 2010
A Christian Response To Homophobic Bullying
I don’t usually agree with Maggie Gallagher. As the founder of the National Organization for Marriage, a leading opponent of marriage equality, we have very little in common. However, in a Op/Ed piece for the New York Post, Ms. Gallagher made an interesting point. After attempting to absolve herself of any blame for the recent suicides of young people bullied for being or seeming gay, she makes this statement:
“Whether you are looking at their faces or looking at the statistics, one thing is clear: These kids need help, real help. They should not become a mere rhetorical strategy, a plaything in our adult battles. Each of these teens is a child of God. And each one deserves better from all of us than becoming a "teachable moment" in someone else's culture war.”
It’s true. While I don’t think the help Maggie is offering is going to do anything but further destroy the self-esteem of even more young people who are different, she is right. They are not talking points, they are so much more than pawns in the battles for equality. They are children of God. They had stories and pasts and possible futures. They have names.
They have names like Tyler Clementi (18), Asher Brown (13), Billy Lucas (15), Seth Walsh (13), Justin Aaberg (15), Zach Harrington (19). They lived in a world where they did not feel welcome. They took the only exit route they knew. Death is a sad and ugly thing, but it’s even uglier when it’s children taking their own lives to escape the endless pressure of hate directed at them because they were either gay or someone just thought they were.
Where could they turn? At school, they were teased and harassed by their fellow students. Tyler was secretly film in a romantic encounter and had his private moments displayed on the internet without his consent. Asher was forced into mock gay sex acts in Phys.Ed. Billy had homosexual slurs hurled at him and was told he didn’t deserve to live by kids at school, even having hate messages posted on his Facebook after his death. Justin was the 5th student in his school district to end his own life in the past year, where teachers are told to remain neutral on bullying.
Nine out of ten LGBT youths have experienced harassment at school. They are four times more likely to attempt suicide, more than a third of all lesbian, gay and bisexual youth have attempted it. 62% of homeless LGB youths have attempted it, twice as many as heterosexual homeless youth. Nearly half of transgender young people have seriously considered suicide.
It’s not easy growing up different. Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual or Transgender persons know this. Beyond that, whether home schooled kids or racial minorities, whether people who wore the wrong clothes or worshipped at the wrong church or just had something different that people didn’t like most of us felt the sting of our peers’ disapproval. I remember joining in a conversation around the lunch table at Broad Street Elementary in Mechanicsburg about the Stealth Bomber as a third grader and being immediately told that no one wanted to hear what I had to say. No explanations as to why my opinion on military equipment was not needed. Just a simple shut-down, at age 8. I remember it vividly, like it happened yesterday not almost twenty years ago. These things stay with us.
But, over time things do improve. We find our niche in the world, we surround ourselves with people who accept us.
The church is rarely that place, and there are good reasons. God calls us to change, to become holy people. The difference between God and the bullies of the world is that God accepts us as-is. The people of God, who are loved by God while we were yet sinners, are also called to accept people as-is.
Do we? Do we understand our role in the world? Instead of being culture warriors, bent on refashioning the world in our own idea of what acceptable behavior is, do we love and accept those around us and help them on the road to change the habits and behaviors that God doesn’t like and accepting the rest, even the ones that we dislike or find uncomfortable?
The Bible speaks quite frequently to the care and help of the downtrodden. In James we find the admonishment that “religion that God our Parent accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after widows and orphans in their distress” and the Psalmist says that “The LORD watches over the alien and sustains the parentless and the widow but frustrates the ways of the wicked.” There is a special place in the heart of God for those who are in need.
In the Matthew, we find Jesus admonishing his followers to not only stop squabbling about who is the greatest but to also become like children. He then goes on to say this: “Whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in my to sin, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”
This is one of my favorite things about Jesus. He doesn’t mind a little hyperbole, and his word pictures are excellent. A millstone is a huge, round disc of stone, often as big or bigger than a man. They were used to grind grains into meal or crushing olives to release oil. They were massively heavy buggers, pulled by ox or mules or more recently by water wheels. These are giant, heavy stones. And Jesus tells his disciples, and in turn us, that if the only way to protect these kids from ourselves is tie one around our neck and jump in a lake then we best get to stepping.
That’s major. And I would posit that if our action and words cause a child to hate him or herself so much that the only way out of that pain and self-hatred is to end their own life, then we are in need of some millstones.
Jesus gives us another word picture, of a man who owns a hundred sheep but one wanders away. He leaves the flock, probably in the care of his hired helpers and few sheepdogs, and goes in search of that lost lamb. “In the same way, your Parent in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.”
Have we been diligent in searching for that one lost sheep? Are we keeping these little ones safe and sound?
We cannot blame ourselves for the suicides that are becoming rampant among LGBT youth. Every person has a choice, and some will choose that dark end to their path. But we do have a duty and an obligation to help those who may be heading that way to see the light of God‘s love and acceptance.
One of the simplest but also extremely difficult ways to do this is live an authentically real life. Being open about being LGBT or a straight ally and a Christian in your everyday life. I’m not saying that you have to wear a nametag that says “Hi, my name is Paul (and I’m a gay Christian)” but the less you hide about your relationships the more people will realize that Gays are not the big scary other but the guy that bags their groceries and the lady that does their taxes.
Rufus Wainwright, out singer/songwriter said this in an interview with Details magazine: “It’s true, it’s tougher career wise if you come out, but this is a human rights issue and it’s important to keep putting dents in it. It’s about two teenagers being beheaded for holding hands in Saudi Arabia. It’s bigger than someone’s music career.”
It is bigger, and it’s something we can do everyday. Don’t sit by as people demean others for their sexuality, their race, their religion, their accent, their place of origin, their financial status, their IQ. Let people know that you don’t feel the same way. Let people know that God doesn’t discriminate, and we shouldn’t either.
It’s important to understand that our words have power. In James we are reminded that “The tongue is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body.” “With our tongue we praise God and also curse people who have been made in the God‘s likeness. This should not be.”
No matter how many times I have been told that “stick and stones my break my bones but words will never hurt me” I never believed it. But while harsh and hurtful words can hurt, true words of comfort and praise can heal. Always keep in mind that what you say has the power to influence others minds, hearts and lives.
There is an exciting online movement called the It Gets Better Project. It’s a video series in which pop stars, politicians and regular people remind teens that while being an young gay person is no easy road, it does get better and it is worth it to stick around and revel in the exciting things the future may bring. Gay celebs and allies have lent their voices to this video series, from President Barack Obama to pop singer Kesha to LGBT employees of Google to pioneering televangelist Oral Roberts’ grandson.
Bishop Mark Hanson, presiding Bishop of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America said this in his recent “It Gets Better” video: "Sometimes the words of my Christian brothers and sisters have hurt you. I also know that our silence causes you pain...You are a beloved child of God. Your life carries the beauty and dignity of God's creation...There is a place for you in this world, and in this Church."
He understands that words have power. That we have a duty and an obligation to our brothers and sisters in Christ, and to the rest of the world, to use our words wisely.
On the flip side, one should also always take the time to listen. Talking only takes you so far, you have to listen to truly understand and help others. Pay attention to the signs:
Increased Isolation
Increases in alchol or drug use
Expressing a negative attitude towards self, hopelessness or helplessness
Changes in regular behavior or interest in usual activities
Giving away valuable possessions
Expressing lack of future orientation like saying “It won’t matter soon” or other suicidal feelings
Signs of depression, even after the depression begins to lift
Describing a specific plan for suicide
Even before these signs manifest, listen. It’s so easy to brush past people without paying them any mind. Keep an open heart and ear, you never know when you can make a new friend and increase the amount of love in this world by listening.
Other ways to protect these little ones is to donate time and money to groups that help at-risk young people. Common Roads, the Central PA LGBT Community Center, Equality PA are great local groups and the Trevor Project provides a national suicide phone hotline and online support.
The Trevor Project also provides a guide for helping someone who is considering suicide with the acronym “Y-Care”
Y is for You - you are never alone and you are not responsible for anyone who chooses to end their own life. All you can do is listen, support and assist the person in getting the help they need.
C is for Connect
Connect the person to resources and to a supportive, responsible adult.
A is for Accept
Accept and listen to the person’s feelings and take them seriously.
R is for Respond
Respond if the person has a plan to attempt suicide and tell someone you trust. If they do have a plan, try to get them to a hospital or police station if possible.
E is for Empower
Empower the person to get help and to call the Trevor Lifeline 1-866-4-U-TREVOR
In fact, program Helpline numbers into your cell phone so you have them available in a moment of crisis.
Last, but most definitely not least: Pray. Pray for guidance when interacting with people. Pray for the people you interact with. Pray for wisdom to see when someone needs your help. And follow up your prayers with action. Take it outside the church.
God is not willing that any of these little ones should perish. Are you?
“Whether you are looking at their faces or looking at the statistics, one thing is clear: These kids need help, real help. They should not become a mere rhetorical strategy, a plaything in our adult battles. Each of these teens is a child of God. And each one deserves better from all of us than becoming a "teachable moment" in someone else's culture war.”
It’s true. While I don’t think the help Maggie is offering is going to do anything but further destroy the self-esteem of even more young people who are different, she is right. They are not talking points, they are so much more than pawns in the battles for equality. They are children of God. They had stories and pasts and possible futures. They have names.
They have names like Tyler Clementi (18), Asher Brown (13), Billy Lucas (15), Seth Walsh (13), Justin Aaberg (15), Zach Harrington (19). They lived in a world where they did not feel welcome. They took the only exit route they knew. Death is a sad and ugly thing, but it’s even uglier when it’s children taking their own lives to escape the endless pressure of hate directed at them because they were either gay or someone just thought they were.
Where could they turn? At school, they were teased and harassed by their fellow students. Tyler was secretly film in a romantic encounter and had his private moments displayed on the internet without his consent. Asher was forced into mock gay sex acts in Phys.Ed. Billy had homosexual slurs hurled at him and was told he didn’t deserve to live by kids at school, even having hate messages posted on his Facebook after his death. Justin was the 5th student in his school district to end his own life in the past year, where teachers are told to remain neutral on bullying.
Nine out of ten LGBT youths have experienced harassment at school. They are four times more likely to attempt suicide, more than a third of all lesbian, gay and bisexual youth have attempted it. 62% of homeless LGB youths have attempted it, twice as many as heterosexual homeless youth. Nearly half of transgender young people have seriously considered suicide.
It’s not easy growing up different. Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual or Transgender persons know this. Beyond that, whether home schooled kids or racial minorities, whether people who wore the wrong clothes or worshipped at the wrong church or just had something different that people didn’t like most of us felt the sting of our peers’ disapproval. I remember joining in a conversation around the lunch table at Broad Street Elementary in Mechanicsburg about the Stealth Bomber as a third grader and being immediately told that no one wanted to hear what I had to say. No explanations as to why my opinion on military equipment was not needed. Just a simple shut-down, at age 8. I remember it vividly, like it happened yesterday not almost twenty years ago. These things stay with us.
But, over time things do improve. We find our niche in the world, we surround ourselves with people who accept us.
The church is rarely that place, and there are good reasons. God calls us to change, to become holy people. The difference between God and the bullies of the world is that God accepts us as-is. The people of God, who are loved by God while we were yet sinners, are also called to accept people as-is.
Do we? Do we understand our role in the world? Instead of being culture warriors, bent on refashioning the world in our own idea of what acceptable behavior is, do we love and accept those around us and help them on the road to change the habits and behaviors that God doesn’t like and accepting the rest, even the ones that we dislike or find uncomfortable?
The Bible speaks quite frequently to the care and help of the downtrodden. In James we find the admonishment that “religion that God our Parent accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after widows and orphans in their distress” and the Psalmist says that “The LORD watches over the alien and sustains the parentless and the widow but frustrates the ways of the wicked.” There is a special place in the heart of God for those who are in need.
In the Matthew, we find Jesus admonishing his followers to not only stop squabbling about who is the greatest but to also become like children. He then goes on to say this: “Whoever welcomes a little child like this in my name welcomes me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in my to sin, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”
This is one of my favorite things about Jesus. He doesn’t mind a little hyperbole, and his word pictures are excellent. A millstone is a huge, round disc of stone, often as big or bigger than a man. They were used to grind grains into meal or crushing olives to release oil. They were massively heavy buggers, pulled by ox or mules or more recently by water wheels. These are giant, heavy stones. And Jesus tells his disciples, and in turn us, that if the only way to protect these kids from ourselves is tie one around our neck and jump in a lake then we best get to stepping.
That’s major. And I would posit that if our action and words cause a child to hate him or herself so much that the only way out of that pain and self-hatred is to end their own life, then we are in need of some millstones.
Jesus gives us another word picture, of a man who owns a hundred sheep but one wanders away. He leaves the flock, probably in the care of his hired helpers and few sheepdogs, and goes in search of that lost lamb. “In the same way, your Parent in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost.”
Have we been diligent in searching for that one lost sheep? Are we keeping these little ones safe and sound?
We cannot blame ourselves for the suicides that are becoming rampant among LGBT youth. Every person has a choice, and some will choose that dark end to their path. But we do have a duty and an obligation to help those who may be heading that way to see the light of God‘s love and acceptance.
One of the simplest but also extremely difficult ways to do this is live an authentically real life. Being open about being LGBT or a straight ally and a Christian in your everyday life. I’m not saying that you have to wear a nametag that says “Hi, my name is Paul (and I’m a gay Christian)” but the less you hide about your relationships the more people will realize that Gays are not the big scary other but the guy that bags their groceries and the lady that does their taxes.
Rufus Wainwright, out singer/songwriter said this in an interview with Details magazine: “It’s true, it’s tougher career wise if you come out, but this is a human rights issue and it’s important to keep putting dents in it. It’s about two teenagers being beheaded for holding hands in Saudi Arabia. It’s bigger than someone’s music career.”
It is bigger, and it’s something we can do everyday. Don’t sit by as people demean others for their sexuality, their race, their religion, their accent, their place of origin, their financial status, their IQ. Let people know that you don’t feel the same way. Let people know that God doesn’t discriminate, and we shouldn’t either.
It’s important to understand that our words have power. In James we are reminded that “The tongue is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body.” “With our tongue we praise God and also curse people who have been made in the God‘s likeness. This should not be.”
No matter how many times I have been told that “stick and stones my break my bones but words will never hurt me” I never believed it. But while harsh and hurtful words can hurt, true words of comfort and praise can heal. Always keep in mind that what you say has the power to influence others minds, hearts and lives.
There is an exciting online movement called the It Gets Better Project. It’s a video series in which pop stars, politicians and regular people remind teens that while being an young gay person is no easy road, it does get better and it is worth it to stick around and revel in the exciting things the future may bring. Gay celebs and allies have lent their voices to this video series, from President Barack Obama to pop singer Kesha to LGBT employees of Google to pioneering televangelist Oral Roberts’ grandson.
Bishop Mark Hanson, presiding Bishop of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America said this in his recent “It Gets Better” video: "Sometimes the words of my Christian brothers and sisters have hurt you. I also know that our silence causes you pain...You are a beloved child of God. Your life carries the beauty and dignity of God's creation...There is a place for you in this world, and in this Church."
He understands that words have power. That we have a duty and an obligation to our brothers and sisters in Christ, and to the rest of the world, to use our words wisely.
On the flip side, one should also always take the time to listen. Talking only takes you so far, you have to listen to truly understand and help others. Pay attention to the signs:
Increased Isolation
Increases in alchol or drug use
Expressing a negative attitude towards self, hopelessness or helplessness
Changes in regular behavior or interest in usual activities
Giving away valuable possessions
Expressing lack of future orientation like saying “It won’t matter soon” or other suicidal feelings
Signs of depression, even after the depression begins to lift
Describing a specific plan for suicide
Even before these signs manifest, listen. It’s so easy to brush past people without paying them any mind. Keep an open heart and ear, you never know when you can make a new friend and increase the amount of love in this world by listening.
Other ways to protect these little ones is to donate time and money to groups that help at-risk young people. Common Roads, the Central PA LGBT Community Center, Equality PA are great local groups and the Trevor Project provides a national suicide phone hotline and online support.
The Trevor Project also provides a guide for helping someone who is considering suicide with the acronym “Y-Care”
Y is for You - you are never alone and you are not responsible for anyone who chooses to end their own life. All you can do is listen, support and assist the person in getting the help they need.
C is for Connect
Connect the person to resources and to a supportive, responsible adult.
A is for Accept
Accept and listen to the person’s feelings and take them seriously.
R is for Respond
Respond if the person has a plan to attempt suicide and tell someone you trust. If they do have a plan, try to get them to a hospital or police station if possible.
E is for Empower
Empower the person to get help and to call the Trevor Lifeline 1-866-4-U-TREVOR
In fact, program Helpline numbers into your cell phone so you have them available in a moment of crisis.
Last, but most definitely not least: Pray. Pray for guidance when interacting with people. Pray for the people you interact with. Pray for wisdom to see when someone needs your help. And follow up your prayers with action. Take it outside the church.
God is not willing that any of these little ones should perish. Are you?
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Why Jennifer Knapp Matters
We all live in the spiritual realm - porn stars, purse-snatchers and pastors alike. I firmly believe this. It doesn't matter whether we choose to notice, or even believe in, the things of the spirit that surround us. They still exist. I don't know any longer if the "God" I was introduced as a small child is an accurate portrait of God but I do believe that those who love mercy and do justice are walking humbly with their God, whoever that spiritual person is to them.
When I hear the word of God's Holy Spirit used to beat down the children of God, it bothers me. Deeply. God is love; St. Johns' first letter tells us this. Why do we feel the need to hate those who don't do things the same way, do not worship in the same way?
Because we are not yet made holy. People are born with evil in their hearts; this I also believe. We must choose to seek the good that God has also placed in our hearts and follow that.
After laying that bit of spiritual groundwork, I want to get to the pop culture portion of today's post. A few weeks ago, one time Christian rock singer Jennifer Knapp came out of the closet with an editorial on CNN's website and an interview with Larry King. It's fascinating, as Knapp is only second well-known Christian singer to come out as a homosexual after a career in the CCM genre.
Her hits include "Undo Me", "Romans" and "A Little More" Knapp's major label debut Kansas was certified Gold and it's follow up The Way I Am was nominated for a Grammy.
Jennifer doesn't put on any airs in her piece on Larry King Live. She comes across as a young woman with a deep spirituality who did just as I did - questioned, questioned, questioned. When you want to live a life full of spiritual pureness, you cannot just accept that something condemed by churches for so long is right just because it "feels right." Her "Take" appears on CNN's Belief Blog (read it here) She talks about her spiritual quest in a very adult way, including her fears: "I questioned whether my faith had betrayed me, or I if had a betrayed my faith." It's deep and beautiful.
I personally find a deeper connection to her music, which I loved as teenager, knowing what her struggle was. "Whole Again" takes on a new meaning:
If I give my life, if I lay it down Can you turn this life around, around Can I be made clean By this offering of my soul? Can I be made whole again?
Can we be made whole? Even in our brokenness, even in these hate-filled days and this selfish world? Is wholeness a real thing? And am I deceiving myself that God, who declared that Jesus made all things clean in a vision to St Peter, can give me a wholeness and a holiness I truly don't deserve?
Only in heaven will we know.
When I hear the word of God's Holy Spirit used to beat down the children of God, it bothers me. Deeply. God is love; St. Johns' first letter tells us this. Why do we feel the need to hate those who don't do things the same way, do not worship in the same way?
Because we are not yet made holy. People are born with evil in their hearts; this I also believe. We must choose to seek the good that God has also placed in our hearts and follow that.
After laying that bit of spiritual groundwork, I want to get to the pop culture portion of today's post. A few weeks ago, one time Christian rock singer Jennifer Knapp came out of the closet with an editorial on CNN's website and an interview with Larry King. It's fascinating, as Knapp is only second well-known Christian singer to come out as a homosexual after a career in the CCM genre.
Her hits include "Undo Me", "Romans" and "A Little More" Knapp's major label debut Kansas was certified Gold and it's follow up The Way I Am was nominated for a Grammy.
Jennifer doesn't put on any airs in her piece on Larry King Live. She comes across as a young woman with a deep spirituality who did just as I did - questioned, questioned, questioned. When you want to live a life full of spiritual pureness, you cannot just accept that something condemed by churches for so long is right just because it "feels right." Her "Take" appears on CNN's Belief Blog (read it here) She talks about her spiritual quest in a very adult way, including her fears: "I questioned whether my faith had betrayed me, or I if had a betrayed my faith." It's deep and beautiful.
I personally find a deeper connection to her music, which I loved as teenager, knowing what her struggle was. "Whole Again" takes on a new meaning:
If I give my life, if I lay it down Can you turn this life around, around Can I be made clean By this offering of my soul? Can I be made whole again?
Can we be made whole? Even in our brokenness, even in these hate-filled days and this selfish world? Is wholeness a real thing? And am I deceiving myself that God, who declared that Jesus made all things clean in a vision to St Peter, can give me a wholeness and a holiness I truly don't deserve?
Only in heaven will we know.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Did You Know God Hates Lady Gaga In Addition To Fags?
I know, I know. When you report on the fame monsters of the Westboro Baptist Church you give them just what they are looking for. Spare me. But the originators of the oh-so-clever "God hates fags" signs produce a hilarious parody of Lady Gaga's "Poker Face" how does a gay boy resist?
As part of the WBC's new campaign against pro-gay pop star Lady Gaga, the granddaughter of founder Pastor Fred Phelps shows just how must she's studied her enemy by doing a spot-on parody of the Billboard chart topper. The songs been floating around the internet for a hot minute, but the video just showed up on the YouTubes this week. It's hysterical, from the lyrics ("you ain't got no poker face... yeah you just got your whorish face") to the insinuation that another 9/11 will occur due to Lady Gaga's concerts to the way you can tell Megan has The Fame on repeat on her iPod. Seriously, if it wasn't so blatantly hateful, it could be my new favorite song...
As part of the WBC's new campaign against pro-gay pop star Lady Gaga, the granddaughter of founder Pastor Fred Phelps shows just how must she's studied her enemy by doing a spot-on parody of the Billboard chart topper. The songs been floating around the internet for a hot minute, but the video just showed up on the YouTubes this week. It's hysterical, from the lyrics ("you ain't got no poker face... yeah you just got your whorish face") to the insinuation that another 9/11 will occur due to Lady Gaga's concerts to the way you can tell Megan has The Fame on repeat on her iPod. Seriously, if it wasn't so blatantly hateful, it could be my new favorite song...
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Trashy Thursdays: Miley Cyrus - "Party In The USA"
Trashy Thursdays will be happening every Thursday (duh) and will feature the trashy pop songs I kinda love. Don't get it twisted, I think pop music is an art form. But like all art, there are brilliant artistic works are fresh and dynamic and new as well as less inspired pieces of art. Sometimes those less inspired bits are as much fun as the "good" stuff, that's why we're getting trashy!
Ok, I'mma be honest here. I HATED this song when it first came out
. I still kinda do, but after the flaccid melody and trite lyrics of "The Climb" any Miley Cyrus single is bound to be an improvement.
Miley was born to make trashy pop, the spawn of country flash-in-the-pan Billy Ray Cyrus has been a child star for a few years before churning out of trash-pop's greatest songs "See You Again." Every crap-tastic single that has followed has paled before that piece of surf-guitar-meets-Kylie-electro-pop brilliance that crashed over me in spring '08. And "Party In The USA" was destined to be merely an annoyingly catchy follow-up to the horrors of "Fly On The Wall."
That is, until the gays got a hold of it. Once a couple of Fire Island boys pop your CD in and start lipsynching on the beach, you have arrived. You are a goddess of trashy pop music; the paragon of all things tacky, yet refined. Miley, I salute you. And to the uninitiated, I present the masterpiece of YouTube: "Party In The FIP"
Ok, I'mma be honest here. I HATED this song when it first came out
. I still kinda do, but after the flaccid melody and trite lyrics of "The Climb" any Miley Cyrus single is bound to be an improvement.Miley was born to make trashy pop, the spawn of country flash-in-the-pan Billy Ray Cyrus has been a child star for a few years before churning out of trash-pop's greatest songs "See You Again." Every crap-tastic single that has followed has paled before that piece of surf-guitar-meets-Kylie-electro-pop brilliance that crashed over me in spring '08. And "Party In The USA" was destined to be merely an annoyingly catchy follow-up to the horrors of "Fly On The Wall."
That is, until the gays got a hold of it. Once a couple of Fire Island boys pop your CD in and start lipsynching on the beach, you have arrived. You are a goddess of trashy pop music; the paragon of all things tacky, yet refined. Miley, I salute you. And to the uninitiated, I present the masterpiece of YouTube: "Party In The FIP"
Monday, August 10, 2009
Vogue Evolution Is ABDC's Feircest Dance Crew!
Last night, Randy Jackson's other fame game America's Best Dance Crew made it's season four debut. This season promises more variety than ever, with b-boys from Seattle and a "hick-hop" crew that mixes line dancing with hip-hop moves.
But of course, I zoned in on the feirceness like a gay bumblebee to a orchid in a vintage Chinese vase. NYC's Vogue Evolution have been competing in the underground balls for a while, and are used to the heightened competition in that world. And the first all gay and transgendered crew in ABDC's history brought the fi-ya! The five-piece ensemble did all kinds of dramatic moves I didn't know existed. Lil' Mama was all about it, she's hosting her own ball and seemed quite up on the culture. I'm kinda jazzed for this new season. Represent!
Watch the full episode here, skip to segment six for Vogue Evolution.
But of course, I zoned in on the feirceness like a gay bumblebee to a orchid in a vintage Chinese vase. NYC's Vogue Evolution have been competing in the underground balls for a while, and are used to the heightened competition in that world. And the first all gay and transgendered crew in ABDC's history brought the fi-ya! The five-piece ensemble did all kinds of dramatic moves I didn't know existed. Lil' Mama was all about it, she's hosting her own ball and seemed quite up on the culture. I'm kinda jazzed for this new season. Represent!
Watch the full episode here, skip to segment six for Vogue Evolution.
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
A Few Thoughts On Prop 8, Opposite Marriage And Kathy Griffin's Mom
It's been a full day since the California Supreme Court uphelp Proposition 8 and I am learning a lot about the legal system. The court decision had more to do with legal processes than it did marriage, and I still think that marriage equality will come in short time to California.BUT, that still doesn't make me any less mystified as to why Prop 8 passed in California to begin with. The proposition made marriage between same sex couples illegal, in case you hadn't heard. It doesn't makes sense to me, but maybe I'm missing something.
Maybe I am oblivious to the gathering storm that Carrie Prejean and her frenemies at NOM have been warning us about. A storm of what exactly? Houses being rented by a committed couple, kids being raised by committed couples, flowers being purchased by one half of a committed couple to give to the other half. I know, it sounds like hell. How dare a man try to woo and marry another man? That's crazy talk!
So, what is the basis for this fear? What kind of horrors will be visited upon your opposite marriage if Justin Timberlake finally gives in to my marriage proposals? I really want to know. My own mother (whom I love and respect, for the record) insists that all marriages should be called civil unions and that would take all the semantics out of the equation. But why all that be changed?
Marriage is already a legal state, one that has been has been constantly evolving as long as humans have been marrying. At one point it was between one man and as many women as he wanted. At other points it was only between a man with money and the daughter of a man who wanted that money. Marriages have been arranged between children for political gain. Marriages have been performed by jumping over brooms. The apostle Paul thought marriage should only be entered into as a last resort, like when you are so horny you can't control yourself. And more recently, marriage has been between a white man and a white woman, or a black man and a black woman.
Why is it such a stretch that an exclusive legal contract between two adults like marriage could be signed by two people regardless of gender? Why should the name suddenly change, without any good reason? A lot of questions, very few good answers. Why can't I visit my husband in the hospital, why can't I inherit his estate, why can't we link our names, our credit history and our hearts before God and these witnesses, just like an opposite married couple can?
What about love? This is the topic we like to dance around. When it comes down to it, when you say that I can't marry my boyfriend you are saying my love is somehow less important, less holy, less committed than the love you have for yours. That you have the right by virtue of your gender to enter a legal contract that I can't. That is what makes it discrimination. That is what makes it wrong.
I don't want this to be a one sided debate, I would love to hear a rational defense for excluding me from the marriage process. And, no, "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve" does not count!
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Did You Watch "Glee"?
I just finished watching the most fabulous hour of network TV since Pushing Daisies was cancelled. If you watched TV, listened to the radio or visited MySpace in the last month, you probably heard that Nip/Tuck and Popular creator Ryan Murphy's new project Glee was premiering after American Idol tonight. But did you watch it? 'Cause you totally should have.
The plot involves Spanish teacher Will Schuester's leading of his Ohio school's Glee Club after the director is fired for sexual harassment. He butts heads with the coach of the cheer team (played by the fabulous Jane Lynch) and the rest of the sports cliches, and even finds himself at odds with his wife. He nearly quits, but is lured back by his passionate love of singing.
I'm not sure if I would call it an hour-long comedy or more of a dramedy, but it had moments both moving and funny. A lot of the characters are a bit broadly portrayed, but Broadway star Lea Michele's Rachel is a revelation. Fresh from winning a Drama Desk award for Spring Awakening, Michele brings a fresh joy to the screen as the overbearing former child prodigy and main diva of glee club. Cory Monteith is also a bright young talent, the two have amazing chemistry and pure joy on their faces as they perform the much hyped "Don't Stop Believin'" at the close of the pilot episode. He also shines in a speech to his football team mates after they call a wheelchair-bound glee member a loser.
It wasn't perfect - I found the closeted former director to be a bit campy, and Schuester's wife is almost unbelievably annoying. But Jayma Mays is delightful as Will's germaphobic coworker nursing a major crush on the married teacher, she has always brought such bubbly enthusiasm to the screen in roles on Ugly Betty and Heroes.
I would highly recommend this bright new series to anyone who loves music, teen comedy or Jane Lynch. Also, in case this doesn't sound gay enough, Josh Groban, the Chenoweth!!!! and Cheyenne Jackson guest star in upcoming episodes. The full series arrives in September, until then watch the pilot at Hulu or Fox.com. And you can download both "Don't Stop Believin'" (which owes a big debt to Petra Haden's cover from Guilt By Association) and a rival Glee club's version of Winehouse's "Rehab" at iTunes. Or just listen below:
The plot involves Spanish teacher Will Schuester's leading of his Ohio school's Glee Club after the director is fired for sexual harassment. He butts heads with the coach of the cheer team (played by the fabulous Jane Lynch) and the rest of the sports cliches, and even finds himself at odds with his wife. He nearly quits, but is lured back by his passionate love of singing.
I'm not sure if I would call it an hour-long comedy or more of a dramedy, but it had moments both moving and funny. A lot of the characters are a bit broadly portrayed, but Broadway star Lea Michele's Rachel is a revelation. Fresh from winning a Drama Desk award for Spring Awakening, Michele brings a fresh joy to the screen as the overbearing former child prodigy and main diva of glee club. Cory Monteith is also a bright young talent, the two have amazing chemistry and pure joy on their faces as they perform the much hyped "Don't Stop Believin'" at the close of the pilot episode. He also shines in a speech to his football team mates after they call a wheelchair-bound glee member a loser.
It wasn't perfect - I found the closeted former director to be a bit campy, and Schuester's wife is almost unbelievably annoying. But Jayma Mays is delightful as Will's germaphobic coworker nursing a major crush on the married teacher, she has always brought such bubbly enthusiasm to the screen in roles on Ugly Betty and Heroes.
I would highly recommend this bright new series to anyone who loves music, teen comedy or Jane Lynch. Also, in case this doesn't sound gay enough, Josh Groban, the Chenoweth!!!! and Cheyenne Jackson guest star in upcoming episodes. The full series arrives in September, until then watch the pilot at Hulu or Fox.com. And you can download both "Don't Stop Believin'" (which owes a big debt to Petra Haden's cover from Guilt By Association) and a rival Glee club's version of Winehouse's "Rehab" at iTunes. Or just listen below:
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Young Gay Christians Ask You To See "Through My Eyes"
A new documentary came to DVD recently, one that really strikes a nerve here at Pictures & Conversations. As should be flamingly obvious, I'm gay. And while I don't discuss it that frequently, I've posted a few times about spiritual matters. That's because I'm a gay Christian.
When I was a teenager and knew everything, the thought of gay Christians was a terrifying thing. Literally, I remember hearing that some gay people claimed to still be Christians and it made me nauseous. That's pretty ironic, coming from a guy who now opening leers at Danny Gokey immediately after leading Bible study.
But it took a lot of time, some help from a few books and a good therapist to get me to this place. A new documentary produced by The Gay Christian Network, Through My Eyes, gives a platform for a couple dozen young GLBT Christians to tell their stories, unfiltered and without a narrative bias. These are real young people who show the human side of a debate that too often rages over ideals and words. Can one be Christian and gay?
Trailer:
Website: Through My Eyes
When I was a teenager and knew everything, the thought of gay Christians was a terrifying thing. Literally, I remember hearing that some gay people claimed to still be Christians and it made me nauseous. That's pretty ironic, coming from a guy who now opening leers at Danny Gokey immediately after leading Bible study.
But it took a lot of time, some help from a few books and a good therapist to get me to this place. A new documentary produced by The Gay Christian Network, Through My Eyes, gives a platform for a couple dozen young GLBT Christians to tell their stories, unfiltered and without a narrative bias. These are real young people who show the human side of a debate that too often rages over ideals and words. Can one be Christian and gay?
Trailer:
Website: Through My Eyes
Sunday, March 1, 2009
Read This! - "Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection" by Tim Bergling
Chasing Adonis is Tim Bergling's third non-fiction piece on gay men, released in 2007. I have not read his two prior titles, Reeling In The Years: Gay Men's Perspectives on Age and Ageism and Sissyphobia: Gay Men and Effeminate Behavior, but after finishing Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection, I am quite interested in acquiring those volumes.
Utilizing information from an online poll, survey and interviews with gay men from all walks of life, Bergling uncovers the truth we all know but don't always like to admit. Men are visual creatures, and we all have ideas as to what visual perfection looks like. The author explores the different sources that influence our desires, from early exposure to hot men in ads. You know the ones I'm talking about. No? Perhaps I'll refresh your memories...
No that we've a little hottie break, let's get back to the book! Tim Bergling provides anecdotes from a variety of men who like men and what they like about men. About what happens when men watch porn or act in porn; and those both performing and observing at the strip club. About the men we fell in love with as kids and the men we fall in love with now. (Psst, they're the same men!) About the boys in the gym, and those who love them... and those that hate them. About body image issues, about the bears vs the twinks vs the muscle queens. A lot of raw data, with an astonishing lack of filter. Despite the fact that Tim's picture presents him as good looking guy with a fit body, he doesn't come off with an agenda of proving that better looking guys are better people. Or worse people, for that matter.
I have a bad habit of believing in a "douche/hotness" scale. I've always felt that the hotter the guy, the more of a douche he would be. Which is totally wrong, because I don't know any really hot guys well enough to make that determination. How can I tell if they are douchey if I never really get to know them? I work retail so I've met a lot of different guys, at least for a few minutes. And while I've had my share of douchey male customers with hot bodies, there have been just as many average guys and gals that have been total twatwaffles.
Chasing Adonis is a light read, no heavy psychobabble or dry statistics. Just a bunch of gay gays doing what they do best: talking about other guys. I recommend it.
Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection is published by Harrington Park Press and is available now.
Utilizing information from an online poll, survey and interviews with gay men from all walks of life, Bergling uncovers the truth we all know but don't always like to admit. Men are visual creatures, and we all have ideas as to what visual perfection looks like. The author explores the different sources that influence our desires, from early exposure to hot men in ads. You know the ones I'm talking about. No? Perhaps I'll refresh your memories...
No that we've a little hottie break, let's get back to the book! Tim Bergling provides anecdotes from a variety of men who like men and what they like about men. About what happens when men watch porn or act in porn; and those both performing and observing at the strip club. About the men we fell in love with as kids and the men we fall in love with now. (Psst, they're the same men!) About the boys in the gym, and those who love them... and those that hate them. About body image issues, about the bears vs the twinks vs the muscle queens. A lot of raw data, with an astonishing lack of filter. Despite the fact that Tim's picture presents him as good looking guy with a fit body, he doesn't come off with an agenda of proving that better looking guys are better people. Or worse people, for that matter.
I have a bad habit of believing in a "douche/hotness" scale. I've always felt that the hotter the guy, the more of a douche he would be. Which is totally wrong, because I don't know any really hot guys well enough to make that determination. How can I tell if they are douchey if I never really get to know them? I work retail so I've met a lot of different guys, at least for a few minutes. And while I've had my share of douchey male customers with hot bodies, there have been just as many average guys and gals that have been total twatwaffles.
Chasing Adonis is a light read, no heavy psychobabble or dry statistics. Just a bunch of gay gays doing what they do best: talking about other guys. I recommend it.
Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection is published by Harrington Park Press and is available now.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Regina Spektor And Dozens Of Newlyweds Break My Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-heart.
The Courage Campaign has put together a video featuring a song from one of my favorite albums of all time. "Fidelity" was the lead single from Regina Spektor's brilliant Begin To Hope disc, and it soundtracks a slide show of couples married in 2008. Same sex couples from California, whose marriages are threatened by Ken Starr's recent filing to annul them. The video puts a human face to gay couples and the families led by them. It's a beautiful video, you should really watch it, then sign the letter to the Supreme Court:
"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.
Happy belated Valentine's Day!
"Fidelity": Don't Divorce... from Courage Campaign on Vimeo.
Happy belated Valentine's Day!
Monday, February 2, 2009
Private Message To Lils From Paulbos: "Yes, I Will Be Your Gay"
I just posted my excitement over the new Lily Allen album, It's Not Me, It's You. I've adored lead single "The Fear" and the Bush-bashing "Fuck You" (even though I voted for him!) and the smattering of other leaked songs. But I just heard a new one, a track not listed on Amazon's current page for the album. It's a bonus track from the Japanese pressing of the new album, the song is called "Fag Hag" and I'm loving it!
First, let's discuss the elephant in the room. Is it OK to use the word 'fag'? I don't mind the word, it's no more derogatory to me than calling me a 'gay' or a 'homo' or 'fruity' (I draw the line at 'cocksucker' because it just sounds tacky) but I don't know that my opinion is typical of average gay men. My problem is when someone calls me gay or fag and mean it as an insult. As if to equate fags with dirty or evil people. And you can do that when very politely referring to us a 'homosexual men' or an equally polite word.
But the thing is, 'fag hag' is a cutesy phrase and I don't know of another common expression that adequately describes the unique relationship between a gay man and his female friends. We can't be 'girlfriends' cause only one of us is a girl, and the relationship is different anyway. Girlfriends can fight over boys, but it's rare that I would have a chance at stealing my hags' men and vice versa. I have a lot of female friends who love going shopping with me and 'boy scouting' (as my hag Shannan would say.) I guess you could say we're BFFs, but I have too many to have them all be besties. If they don't mind being called 'hags' I don't mind being called 'fag.' I would totally want Lily as one of my fag hags, I would totally love to be her gay. She's catty, she has great fashion sense and would be a ball of fun.
The song is a frothy bit of pop, with a catchy chorus and an shimmery electro sound. The lyrics describe a stereotypical fag/hag relationship, with the shopping for furniture and the reading of the travel section and the general silliness of that friendship. Listen
Fag Hag - Lily Allen
First, let's discuss the elephant in the room. Is it OK to use the word 'fag'? I don't mind the word, it's no more derogatory to me than calling me a 'gay' or a 'homo' or 'fruity' (I draw the line at 'cocksucker' because it just sounds tacky) but I don't know that my opinion is typical of average gay men. My problem is when someone calls me gay or fag and mean it as an insult. As if to equate fags with dirty or evil people. And you can do that when very politely referring to us a 'homosexual men' or an equally polite word.
But the thing is, 'fag hag' is a cutesy phrase and I don't know of another common expression that adequately describes the unique relationship between a gay man and his female friends. We can't be 'girlfriends' cause only one of us is a girl, and the relationship is different anyway. Girlfriends can fight over boys, but it's rare that I would have a chance at stealing my hags' men and vice versa. I have a lot of female friends who love going shopping with me and 'boy scouting' (as my hag Shannan would say.) I guess you could say we're BFFs, but I have too many to have them all be besties. If they don't mind being called 'hags' I don't mind being called 'fag.' I would totally want Lily as one of my fag hags, I would totally love to be her gay. She's catty, she has great fashion sense and would be a ball of fun.
The song is a frothy bit of pop, with a catchy chorus and an shimmery electro sound. The lyrics describe a stereotypical fag/hag relationship, with the shopping for furniture and the reading of the travel section and the general silliness of that friendship. Listen
Fag Hag - Lily Allen
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Clay Aiken Comes Out!
It's what all the blogs have been buzzing about, ever since Perez Hilton leaked it earlier today: Clay Aiken, American Idol season two runner up, is People's cover boy, with his baby and his less-than-surprising admission. Clay Aiken is gay.
Many have assumed as much, but Clay himself has bull doggedly defended his right to keep the sexual part of his life a secret. While it may seem ridiculous to many that anyone would stay in the closet in this day and age of increased tolerance, I totally understand his hesitancy.
It was only a year and a half ago that I came out to my sister and some of my close friends. I was scared of what God thought, which is something a southern Christian like Clay would be worried about too. So many anxious thoughts: "Am I already going to hell, just pumping that gas?" "Even I think guys are hot but don't ever act on it, can I still go to heaven?" "What if I pretend to like girls and get married and everything, and finally tell myself the truth after it's too late? That would suck!" It takes a lot of soul searching to reconcile my truth with God's truth, and I think that's something Clay Aiken probably did.
The thing is, people have been assuming that Clay knew all along that he was gay, since the world kind of had him pegged from day one. And maybe he did, I don't know. But everyone in my circle knew before I did, back when I thought I was confused. And just because someone loves the theatre, disco, designer clothes and hair color; hates sports and outdoorsy things; and generally acts gay, doesn't mean they know they are. Their family might know it, but they won't pressure them to come out until they know it too. After all, my family loves me whether I'm gay, straight or a hot tranny mess. And I hope Clay has those kinds of friends and family in his life. He's gonna need them.
Many have assumed as much, but Clay himself has bull doggedly defended his right to keep the sexual part of his life a secret. While it may seem ridiculous to many that anyone would stay in the closet in this day and age of increased tolerance, I totally understand his hesitancy.
It was only a year and a half ago that I came out to my sister and some of my close friends. I was scared of what God thought, which is something a southern Christian like Clay would be worried about too. So many anxious thoughts: "Am I already going to hell, just pumping that gas?" "Even I think guys are hot but don't ever act on it, can I still go to heaven?" "What if I pretend to like girls and get married and everything, and finally tell myself the truth after it's too late? That would suck!" It takes a lot of soul searching to reconcile my truth with God's truth, and I think that's something Clay Aiken probably did.
The thing is, people have been assuming that Clay knew all along that he was gay, since the world kind of had him pegged from day one. And maybe he did, I don't know. But everyone in my circle knew before I did, back when I thought I was confused. And just because someone loves the theatre, disco, designer clothes and hair color; hates sports and outdoorsy things; and generally acts gay, doesn't mean they know they are. Their family might know it, but they won't pressure them to come out until they know it too. After all, my family loves me whether I'm gay, straight or a hot tranny mess. And I hope Clay has those kinds of friends and family in his life. He's gonna need them.
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