Based On A True Story

I've been reading almost exclusively non-fiction these days, which is a complete turn around from my childhood. The one genre that held my attention in between Nancy Drew then and histories of gay porn and disco now is celebrity memoirs. As a kid I devoured the entire autobiography section of our rural library - which meant I'd read autobios of Reba, Dolly, Barbara Mandrell and Kathie Lee by the time I was 15. As a sheltered child I knew of these names but very little of what they did. I was entranced by their stories none the less.

Recently I finished Ricky Martin's exquisite memoir Me. As much as I was hoping for a juicy tell all with lots of details about exploits with other attractive Latin men, it was a surprisingly engaging and very spiritual life story. He didn't name names but he did discuss in depth his own inner turmoil surrounding his sexuality, his infamous interview with Barbara Walters (where he denied his homosexuality) and eventual decision to come out while writing the book.

But Me is about a lot more than that. It's about leaving his family to join the factory-like atmosphere of Menudo, his exhaustion after his US breakthrough and his calling to protect children around the world from sex traffickers. He talks about becoming a father. It's beautiful and a rather literary read. It could have used a few more pictures of the sexy star, but it's not really that kind of book. Unfortunately.

But turning to something a little more silly on the surface, I also read Confessions Of A Prairie Bitch by Alison Arngrim. The former child star of Little House On The Prairie is to this day known around the world as the hateful brat Nellie Oleson, even to the point of being beat up at a press event by child fans of the show during its heyday.

But Alison's story is much deeper than playing one of the most famous villains on family friendly TV. Her parents were in a marriage of convenience, a gay father who pushed his two kids into any publicity to further their career. Her brother molested her, starting at age 6. And she lost her gay best friend and TV husband to AIDS. These events led her into speaking up for AIDS organizations and going on Larry King Live to get tougher incest penalties enacted in California. Being a prairie bitch opened doors and gave a hurt young girl strength.

I would highly recommend both books to more than just fans of these very different celebrities.

"He's Got The Whole World In His Pants"

Have you ever had a boneheaded moment when you realized that you have been singing the wrong words for years? Not just substituting "loaded gun complex" for "loaded God complex" in "Sugar, We're Going Down" or scrambling "Bohemian Rhapsody" but mis-singing the title of a popular song, over and over again?

As a kid, I had a book of these lyrical gaffes and we LOL'd over them frequently. "Hold my clothes and tie me down sir" instead of "Hold me closer, tiny dancer"? Silly human ears. Of course, "'Scuse Me While I Kiss This Guy" is now a website (interwebs is the new books, kids!) for you to browse other people's mistakes.

I was please to find out that I was not the only one mistaking the chorus of Til Tuesday's one hit "Voices Carry" to be "hush, hush/Even downtown was so scary"

However, it seems I am alone in thinking Prince wasn't singing about a "Little Red Corvette" but a "Mir-a-cle Man." As a child, I assume it was a Jesus song.

So, what lyrics have you goofed on?

Read This: "Pride And Prejudice And Zombies" by Jane Austen & Seth Grahame-Smith

Can we agree that Jane Austen's Pride And Prejudice is one of the greatest books of all time? (We can't? I'm not sure we can be friends anymore...) The Regency-era romance is a chick-lit classic, a Brit-lit staple and for more a than a few girls (and boys,) a constant re-read. I've seen both of the major filmed adaptions, the 5-hour miniseries featuring Colin Firth (in a bathtub, no less!) and the more recent version with Keira Knightley as heroine Elizabeth Bennett. I've also seen the bouncy and brightly colored spectacle that is the Bollywood version, Bride & Prejudice. The story lends itself to film very well, but can the main story actually be improved in print? If you add zombies, it can.

In Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, a parody/homage/adaptation of the Austen's most-loved novel, the plot remains virtually identical to the source material. Mrs. Bennett is still trying to marry off her five daughters, Mr. Darcy is still so proud and Jane and Mr. Bingley are still star crossed lovers for a good part of the story. Even some of the dialogue remains the same. The difference? England is besieged by zombies (referred to in turn as unmentionables or Satan's army) and the Bennett sisters trained with their father in the east on martial arts to fend off attacking brain-eaters.

Lizzy remains a model of the strong young woman, not just resistant to the allures of an easy marriage to her unattractive and obnoxious cousin Mr Collins but also a strong fighter, taking down zombies with guns, swords and her bare hands. When she meets Lady Catherine De Bourgh, the greatest warrior Britain has ever known, she spars with her troop of ninjas before sparring verbally with her.

The scene where Elizabeth rejects Darcy is probably one of the most delicious reworkings in the book. The dialogue is almost lifted verbatim from the original text, but spoken during a heated fight. The mind swims with the theatrical possibilities. And the tweaking results in a hilarious twist on Lydia's marriage, while the story of the Collins's is quite sweet and sad.

It's a fast-paced horror/romance hybrid with all the regency era niceties mixed in with the gory brain-eating. I highly recommend it, even if your not an Austen fan like me.

A trailer for the follow-up novel, Sense & Sensibility & Sea Monsters:

[Diva Week] My Diva: Alice

And so it ends! Diva Week comes to a close with the diva, the girl whose path I have followed since I was a child. Before I started reading My Diva, I had a million divas in mind. My friends thought Madonna was my ultimate diva, I figured Kelly Clarkson was the diva I loved most.

But reading so many men who found a connection early on, I knew it wasn't Kelly. Don't get me wrong, I love Kelly. But when I though back to the diva who inspired me from childhood, it came to me.

I can't remember the first time I read Alice's Adventures In Wonderland or the sequel, Through The Looking Glass. I'm sure I saw the Disney cartoon very early on, with it's garish technicolored hues and catchy songs. But the book came into my life as child in an abridged from, one of those inexpensive children's hardbacks they used to sell at Walmart. As I grew up, I read the actual Carroll book many times and purchased an Annotated copy when I was teenager. I still read it once a year or so.

Alice inspires me. I know, a grown man of almost 26 being inspired by a small Victorian-era dreamchild is ridiculous. From the moment she sees that White Rabbit go running by, she follows it. She isn't fearful, she isn't stopped by the question of what practical good it is to chase a rabbit into it's hole. Even when her scenario turns frightening, she pushes on. Her curiosity and tenacity never waver, she still possesses that childlike idea that if something is interesting one should pursue it.

A lot of strange and wonderful things happen to Alice in her adventures. She changes sizes, because she keeps putting on gloves and eating things she shouldn't. It should be a warning to her, but she doesn't want to stop experiencing things. That is one way Alice has inspired me. I often want to stop putting my hand in the fire, to give up on dating or writing. But I know that I will never experience life unless I risk it again.

I know there is much to said for contentment. But I don't want to be content with mediocrity. And neither does Alice, she pushes for that garden she spies through the key hole. She doesn't accept just sitting and having tea with a March Hare and a Mad Hatter. She has a goal, a dream. And she pursues it.

I wish I could be like that all the time. In my best moments, the ones that have resulted in the biggest joys, and sometimes pains, I am like that. Long before I started this blog, I had already chosen a name and the quote that sits atop the page. It's a quote from the very beginning of Alice's Adventures In Wonderland. There isn't really any special meaning to the quote, just something I liked and though fit the mood.

In fact, my favorite quote is kind of Alice-inspired. From Gwen Stefani's Wonderland-esque video "What You Waitin' For?" comes this gem that gives me the push to follow that White Rabbit down the hole into a new place I never dreamed of: "Take a chance, you stupid ho."



In a way, Alice has always been reminding me of both the joys and pitfalls of being a Diva. You carve your own path, you follow your own dream and know that through patience, determination and hard work you will get what you want. And be fabulous doing it!

Read This! "My Diva: 65 Gay Men on the Women Who Inspire Them" - Edited by Michael Montlack

Just in time for Harrisburg's Pride Fest, we're talking divas all week! And what better way to start out the week with a review of the brand new book that inspired the theme, My Diva.

Gay men and divas go back as far as pop culture history. From Billie Holiday's male assistant who would borrow her furs and clothes for a night out on the town to Lady Gaga's massive gay following, gay men love women who are larger than life. But My Diva covers more than the "Liza-Judy-Barbra-Bette, these are names we shan't forget" gaggle of Divas/Goddesses/Icons. In fact, Judy Garland and Barbra Striesand don't even get an entry, instead the focus is on the ladies with whom the authors felt a personal connection with. Bjork, Nina Simone and Sade take their place, as well as authors like Virgina Wolfe and chefs like Julia Child. There is more to being a diva than sequins and hysterics.

We hear the memories of a little boy locking himself away from his troubles with Bewitched reruns in Richard Blanco's ode to Endora. We identify with the heartbreak that leads Patrick Letellier to draw strength from Queen Elizabeth I. While we may not know the same cultural circumstances that lead Kenji Oshima to idealize Margaret Cho, we get a better glimpse at the childhood of a young Asian gay man.

And some of the classic divas do stroll in: Cher, Liz, Miss Ross. But no one descends into yippy fangirling. These real men found a muse, a mother figure or a heroine in the women whose varying degrees of fame don't distract from the devotion and worship of their divas. Some have personal connections to the ladies they love, others have only seen them breifly, and many only know them through the magic of the page, radio or screen. Fictional charactors can be divas, too. Wonder Woman, Princess Leia and Auntie Mame each inspire without being real.

Each entry is but a few pages, making My Diva a swift and breezy read. Even though it's not a paperback, I'd even recommend it as a beach read. Because of the shortness of the stories, when you hit a strangely paced bit like the artsy Anna Moffo bit, you'll get to another sweet, funny, poignant or bittersweet tale of a man and his diva. 65 divas, 65 men who love them. What else do you need?

Libraries: The Medicine Chest of the Soul

The title of this post comes from an inscription from the ancient library at Thebes. Yes, I just got high-brow on your asses. It literally just happened. I also named dropped Marie de France during my sermon on Sunday. You would be forgiven for thinking I went to college, I can sound really learned sometimes...

I love libraries. Perhaps this comes as news to you, someone who posts Britney Spears videos doesn't seem like the type to get all Marion The Librarian on y'all. I'm a multi-faceted motherfucker. When I was 14 I walked two miles each way to go to the library a couple of times.

There is something magical about an entire room full of books on just about any subject you can think of, all for your enjoyment. The library I grew up with in Blain, PA was tiny, it was contained in an old house and the books fit in the dining and living rooms, with the checkout area, card catalog (remember those?) and magazine rack in the kitchen. With working water and everything!

I devoured Nancy Drew mysteries as youngster, then moved on to Agatha Christie novels and celebrity biographies as a teen. I read a Barbra Striesand bio when I was 13 or 14 and fell in love with fabulousness right then. Dolly Parton, Barbara Mandrell and Reba followed right after, I didn't have a chance in hell of being straight. I listened to Pride & Prejudice on audio book a million times while mowing grass, I heard the brilliant words of Jane Austen before I even read them.

I was 16 when we moved to Potter County. Even more isolated from big city influences, the mysteries of Elizabeth Peters and Lillian Jackson Braun were the link between the world I left behind and the one I had entered. A lot changed in a few months - new house, new neighbors, new family circle and no father. I read a lot, devouring whole books in a day or two. But the library in Coudersport was bigger, it had tons of audiobooks, movies and CDs besides my paper and hardback friends. There were mainstream artists like Madonna and Britney Spears as well as a Gershwin collection that I borrowed repeatedly, and my sisters loved the audiobooks. They even had favorite narrators, and they would try titles they never would have based on the reader.

I also developed an interest in young adult fantasy novels, trying out Artimis Fowl and Harry Potter as well as more adult series like the Acorna and Xanth novels. And the library also had a slew of Star Wars and Star Trek novels and I ran right through the entire collection.

I've been back in Harrisburg for over five years, and my library usage is more sporadic. For one thing, my reading time is more limited. I usually only read on my lunch break at work and maybe a couple of minutes before bed. While my trips to the library as a child and into my teens involved canvas bags full of reading material, enough to keep me occupied for two weeks, now I'm lucky to finish a book in two weeks. Unless it's really good, or really short.

But I get into a groove every now and again, going every two weeks for months on end. I read a lot more non-fiction. A history of Nancy Drew here, a C.S. Lewis religious volume there, Billie Holiday's autobiography, a little of this and a little of that. I also love looking through the audio CDs, they often have boxed sets I could never afford as well as a collection of the 33 1/3 series books packed with the CD. I often find newer indie albums, as well as regular pop and rock CDs, so I can try before I purchase. I'm sampling recent efforts by Morrissey and Sara Watkins right now.

The East Shore Area Library also has a fantastic graphic novel section. I'm not a huge fan of graphic novels and comics, but I've found some really interesting titles that appeal to those outside the traditional comic fan base. I reviewed Skim on the blog a while back, that came from the library. I also read a graphic novel based on The Merchant Of Venice.

I stopped into the library on Monday in search of two books. The first, I read about in an ad the library had placed in The Central Voice. They had a display of LGBT books in honor of Harrisburg's Pride Fest later this month, and one in particular stood out. My Diva: 65 Gay Men On The Women Who Inspire Them looks like my kind of fabulous. I picked it up, and started reading it on Tuesday at work. It's a quick read, each Diva story is only a few pages. I will be sure to post a full review when I finish.

The other book I stopped in for wasn't available. I wanted to read fellow Junior-phile Sam's short story in Best Gay Love Stories 2010, but there wasn't one in the system. So I stopped at Borders and pick it up there. (Should've ordered on Amazon and saved five bucks!) When I finish My Diva, I can keep the gay train rolling! As if I could ever stop it...

I guess the moral to this story is that you should check out your library. Or do you already? If so, tell me what you've read/heard/seen lately that's good. I always want to add to my reading list...

Read This! "The Hidden Spirituality Of Men: Ten Metaphors For Awakening The Sacred Masculine" by Matthew Fox

It's been several weeks since I was at Heaven & Nature Store for the first time. It's a cozy little shoppe in the Harrisburg area, selling spiritual jewelery, essential oils and a variety of other "New Age" type products. I went looking for ear candles, because I saw them on Tyra a long while ago and wanted to try them out. While I was there, I browsed the books in the corner and saw a book by Matthew Fox called The Hidden Spirituality Of Men: Ten Metaphors For Awakening The Sacred Masculine. I had just wrapped up a Bible study for my church, and we were discussing the possibility of a male-centric study, so I picked it up. I was hesitant about picking up a book by an author I knew nothing about, but I gave into the urge.

As it turns out, Matthew Fox is a major writer and speaker and a founder of the "creation spirituality" movement. I wouldn't know this because I come from a very traditional church background and am just now exploring new avenues of spirituality that allow for a Christian perspective. The Hidden Spirituality Of Men is perfect for stretching the mind of both men and women.

It's not an light book to read, but real truth rarely presents itself with ease. The ten metaphors explore different facets of the human spirit, and while the focus is men, Fox is quick to emphasize that all people have a marriage of the sacred masculine and the divine feminine. Basically, ladies are welcome. Unlike some of the modern men's movements in the church, Fox does play power games in the war of gender roles.

I found myself intrigued by the ways that much of the eastern spiritual practices like Buddhism dovetail into the western religions and even the rituals of the native peoples of the Americas. I also liked the fact that Fox doesn't put a higher stock in one over the other. I still found myself uncomfortable with some of the eastern imagery being raised to the heights as the Christian traditions, but it does force one to explore the validity of God's hand in all people and traditions.

The chapters on the Earth Fathers and the Green Man are both quite timely with the emphasis on the link between our spiritual and ecological health. The metaphors of Earth Father, and Icarus and Daedalus, were especially revealing in terms of being both a father in the physical sense and the broader sense of mentor. I think most men will appreciate the validity brought to the sexual aspect of our spirituality, which is a refreshing change from the shame-based system currently in play at most religious institutions.

I really would recommend this book to those looking to ask the hard questions about male spirituality and challenge old stereotypes about gender roles and world culture. You may find it a hard read, but it quite worth it.

Read This! - "Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection" by Tim Bergling

Chasing Adonis is Tim Bergling's third non-fiction piece on gay men, released in 2007. I have not read his two prior titles, Reeling In The Years: Gay Men's Perspectives on Age and Ageism and Sissyphobia: Gay Men and Effeminate Behavior, but after finishing Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection, I am quite interested in acquiring those volumes.

Utilizing information from an online poll, survey and interviews with gay men from all walks of life, Bergling uncovers the truth we all know but don't always like to admit. Men are visual creatures, and we all have ideas as to what visual perfection looks like. The author explores the different sources that influence our desires, from early exposure to hot men in ads. You know the ones I'm talking about. No? Perhaps I'll refresh your memories...

No that we've a little hottie break, let's get back to the book! Tim Bergling provides anecdotes from a variety of men who like men and what they like about men. About what happens when men watch porn or act in porn; and those both performing and observing at the strip club. About the men we fell in love with as kids and the men we fall in love with now. (Psst, they're the same men!) About the boys in the gym, and those who love them... and those that hate them. About body image issues, about the bears vs the twinks vs the muscle queens. A lot of raw data, with an astonishing lack of filter. Despite the fact that Tim's picture presents him as good looking guy with a fit body, he doesn't come off with an agenda of proving that better looking guys are better people. Or worse people, for that matter.

I have a bad habit of believing in a "douche/hotness" scale. I've always felt that the hotter the guy, the more of a douche he would be. Which is totally wrong, because I don't know any really hot guys well enough to make that determination. How can I tell if they are douchey if I never really get to know them? I work retail so I've met a lot of different guys, at least for a few minutes. And while I've had my share of douchey male customers with hot bodies, there have been just as many average guys and gals that have been total twatwaffles.

Chasing Adonis is a light read, no heavy psychobabble or dry statistics. Just a bunch of gay gays doing what they do best: talking about other guys. I recommend it.

Chasing Adonis: Gay Men and the Pursuit of Perfection is published by Harrington Park Press and is available now.

Read This! "Lydia Bennet's Story" by Jane Odiwe

I'm an die hard Jane Austen fan, her unfailing devotion to a love-conquers-all ideal dovetails with my inner romantic perfectly. But above all, she was a brilliant writer, filling her novels with sparkling dialogue and great wit. The characters may not always been totally realistic (Fanny in Mansfield Park gets this accusation lobbed at her quite frequently) but there is much heart and spunk behind the heroines.

I wasn't sure what I would make of another author taking a stab at these characters, continuing the stories of my favorite of the Austen novels, Pride And Prejudice. But I'm always game to try new books, and if Lydia Bennett was ruined in Jane Odiwe's story I would not be that distressed. After all, even her father finds her to be one of the silliest girls in the land.

Lydia Bennet's Story starts while Lizzie is visiting her cousin Mr. Collins and his wife. Lydia flirts with the dashing Mr. Wickham, as well as any other redcoat that will ask her to dance. When she finally makes it to Brighton, she finds Mr. Wickham continues to tickle her fancy, but she is quite put off by his interest in other ladies. When she convinces herself that she loves him, and he loves her, the elopement plans fall quickly into place. About halfway through out the novel Odiwe begins to continue the story past what we know from Austen's narrative.

Lydia, while still quite silly, cannot help but notice her new husband is not really as perfect as she had led herself to believe. She continues to flirt harmlessly, but her spouse goes beyond flirtations, as well as gambling and drinking. Mrs. Wickham invites herself to her sister Jane's new home, while Mr. Wickham takes himself to Bath. While reconnecting to her old friends, she finds herself at odds with the brother of one. Scandal strikes, and Lydia learns about real emotional connections.

The ending is pretty easy to guess once you get into the second half of the novel, but like Austen's stories, the plot always takes a backseat to tone and wit. Lydia Bennet's Story is no different. While some of the comments are more ribald than dear Jane would have penned, Odiwe really captures the playful social commentary that Austen loved to present. I was quite pleased with this novel, it's light and fluffy but with a lot of heart.

Read This! "Attack Of The Theater People" by Marc Acito

I've never read Marc Acito's first novel How I Paid For College to which Attack Of The Theater People is a sequel. But reading the first one does not seem to be a requirement to enjoy this delightful novel of young people in the city that never sleeps.

It's the mid-1980s. Edward Zanni has just been expelled from Julliard, having been too "jazz hands" for the prestigious drama school, and is now in need of employment. Through a series of truly hilarious moments, he find a job pretending to be a VJ for British MTV at Bar Mitzvahs. That leads him to spying for a hunky insider-trading stockbroker, which eventually gets him and his roommate in trouble with the feds. All the while, he's getting in trouble with thirteen-year-old stalkers, being pursued by an amorous Asian and lusting after his high school crush who has become the lead singer for a Bruce Springsteen cover band.

The plot of Attack Of The Theater People is completely ridiculous, but that's not really a problem. It's consistently hilarious, peopled with the kind of characters that are at once real and really funny. I was never distracted by the ludicrous nature of the circumstances that continually happen, like putting on a guerrilla theatre production of The Music Man starring a deaf guy or the chase scene towards the end which requires Edward to stage-crash Starlight Express. The joyful exuberance of gays in New York, and the snappy dialogue is enough to distract you, even if there were any plot holes in sight. But it's a really tightly written novel, even under the layers of insanity. Plus, Edward's so AIDS-intimidated he's celibate through most of the novel, which avoids the trappings of soft-core porn one usually finds in gay fiction.

Occasionally the 1980s references get a little obvious but all together this is a breezy read with a million laughs. And most importantly: a lot of heart.

Read This! "Skim" by Mariko Tamaki and Jillian Tamaki

I always feel the need to preface any talk about graphic novels and comics with a comment like "I don't really get into graphic novels, but..." I don't know why, I guess I don't want to act like I know anything about comics when all I've done is read a couple. I don't really get into superhero books or series, but I've been picking up and reading a lot of more literary titles at the library. I read a graphic novel version of "The Merchant Of Venice" a few months ago, I sat at the library and read this cute one about a guy who lives in California and his girlfriend lives in Puerto Rico. I don't remember the title, but it was really sweet.

I just finished a book called "Skim" over the weekend. It took me only two lunch breaks to read, that's one of the advantages to graphic novels. Written by Mariko Tamaki and drawn by her cousin Jillian, "Skim" follows the titular Canadian student as she navigates a high school shattered by the suicide of a classmates' ex. The cool girls try to "help" Katie, the victim's ex girlfriend, but only succeed in make her feel worse. Skim has her own troubles; her best friend is getting interested in boys and popularity instead of the Wicca and tarot cards that used to interest them. Then she finds herself falling for her teacher, Ms. Archer. New relationships make things complicate, old friendships are shattered and while some secrets are revealed, others stay where they should.

Changes are a part of every one's teenage years, and cousins Mariko and Jillian create an artistically pleasing story that will resonate with youth everywhere. Even if you are not into graphic novels, you should consider reading "Skim."

After Elton Wants To Know: What Are The Greatest Gay Books? (I Can't Answer That One.)

After Elton, the Logo-owned website for the gays does a Hot 100 list of the one hundred hottest men, chosen by gay and bi-sexual men. It varies a bit from what People lists as their hottest bachelors, but not as much as the difference between lesbian sister-site After Ellen's list and Maxim's list. They recently did a list of the Top 50 Gay Movies (Brokeback Mountain topped the list, obviously) and now they are compiling a similar list of gay books.

Here's the thing. I'm a bad gay. I mean, my taste in music is pretty gay, I love both new school gay faves like Scissor Sisters and Regina Spektor, 80s gay icons like Madonna and Cyndi Lauper and the 'divas' like Cher and Babs. But I've never read "The Boys In The Band" or anything by Trumane Capote, the first Broadway musical I ever saw was just a few months ago and I've never seen Brokeback Mountain or watched Queer As Folk.

So I only have a couple of queer-friendly books under my belt: Christopher Rice's "The Snow Garden" and "A Density Of Souls," which marked the first time I ever fell head-over-heels for a fictional character; and a young adult fiction book called "Thinking Straight" by Robin Reardon, which I just read a month or so ago. It was an interesting look at a "Exodus"-style camp for young people who have drug, crime and sexual problem. I was really intrigued by the topic of gay Christian teens, some finding it easier to reconcile the two than others. I've also read a few gay-friendly celebrity bios, like Barbara Streisand, Dolly Parton and Chelsea Handler. And there was the Star Trek: New Frontier novel spinoff series, which featured a character who was a "s/he" - both male and female. Does that count?

It doesn't really bother me that my sexuality doesn't influence my book selection. But I just noticed both the books I got at the library today could be considered queer-fiction. "Skim" is a graphic novel by Mariko Tamaki and Jillian Tamaki, and discovering ones sexuality in high school is one of the themes of the book. The other is Marc Acito's "Attack Of The Theater People" which is the sequel to the popular "How I Paid For College" I've heard it's pretty funny, all about guys in The Big Apple in 1986. I'm looking forward to reading both.

But I've just scratched the surface on Gay Lit, and I've never read any of the important biographies or novels mentioned in the comments at afterelton.com. I've already written a couple of titles down to check at the library next time I go. I'm especially interested in a novel by Marion Zimmer Bradley, whose Arthur books I've enjoyed. Since I am such an avid reader, I'm surprised I haven't read more books about people like me. If you have any suggestions, leave them in the comments. Also, if you've read more than me be sure to vote at After Elton.

Paramore Gets Moody With Twilight Single

Confession: I have never read the Twilight books. I keep forgetting to check them out at the library, and now I feel all left out 'cause everybody loves them. I came late to the Harry Potter party, was born too late to be an original Narnia and Lord Of The Rings fan, and apparently my love for Artemis Fowl is not enough to force a movie to be made. But enough tales from the Young Adult section! Let's talk music...

Paramore's Hayley Williams loves the Twilight books, like every emo girl should. So it makes sense that the band perform the lead single for the upcoming movie. "Decode" is a moody, almost gothic pop-punk track with Hayley's vocals doing what they do best: bouncing between walls of electric guitars and drums and emoting like no other power-pop princess. Listen to the song at Stephanie Meyer's official site.

Improve Your Vocabulary: "Chantpleure"

I just started reading one of the books I bought while I was at Barnes & Nobles last week. It's called "Poplollies & Bellibones: A Celebration Of Lost Words" and it's a very interesting collection of words that are no longer used by the general population. Some I can understand why they went out of style, like "feat" (meaning a lock of hair) but easily confused with "feet" (meaning the things at the end of your legs.) Others are kind of ugly sounding words, like "ilimp" a synonym for "happen" so can see why they are no longer used.
One word I would like to reintroduce to the world, though, is a very pretty French-based word: "chantpleure." It means "to weep and sing at the same time" and since I can't think of another word that means the same thing, I'm not sure why it was ever disused to begin with. Curiouser still, I don't know why musical theatre critics, or any type of music critic, haven't brought it back. It's such a specific meaning, and such a lovely word, I shall be attempting to use it in my writing and I encourage you to do the same. I'm hoping Brooke will chantpleure on American Idol this week, that will make it easy to slip it in, especially since I doubt I'll have a use for it in my reviews of the new albums by the Snoods or Madonna. Maybe if I review the new US release Robyn's album I can make it fit. But I'd rather introduce it organically than shoehorn it in. It's not like "that's hot" or "bootylicious" it's a more sensitive word.

Today At B&N...

I stopped at Barnes & Nobles this afternoon to check up on an application I had put in there a few weeks ago. The manager of the new B&N at the Harrisburg East Mall was the one I happened to ask, and she remembered my application! Which is very cool, she said they would probably start interveiws in June or so. Cross your fingers for me, I would love to work at a bookstore, that would be the ideal retail job for me!
But that's not the thing that's wriggling around in my mind. Also while I was there, I picked up a couple of books, one very interesting one that I may blog about later. I was standing in line, and a woman joins the line behind me. I just glanced over at her book, and it's a novel by Ted Dekker. My sister Abby loves that author, so I said so. She told me she thought it looked suspenseful, I told her the ones I'd read were. She told me she had finished her book and was out grabbing lunch, so she needed a new one. We spoke for a couple moments longer about Borders Rewards vs B&N's club thingy.
It was just a simple conversation, but I don't conversate with strangers that often. Well, I do sometimes. I do occasionally mention CDs I like, compliment cute shoes or hair, that sort of thing when I'm out and about. I don't do it all the time, but I like it when strangers compliment my hair, rings or coat, which they do, so I like to give a shout out to funky hairdos when I see them. But never to cute guys! I have no game with dudes, I can compliment a chick without thinking, but I see a hot guy and all I can do is think "Must not stare" and try to avoid them. I don't know how to change that, I really wish I could though. How many possible dates have I passed up by being so stupid? Well, not that many I'm sure, but if it's been even one I'm seriously bummed.

Read This? "The Little Girl Who Was Too Fond Of Matches" by Gaetan Soucy

This is quite possibly the strangest novel I've ever read. "The Little Girl Who Was Too Fond Of Matches" was written in the first person perspective of one of two siblings who wake up one morning to discover they're father has dies, leaving them orphaned and alone. They have no first hand knowledge of the world outside of the sprawling property they live on, but by reading "dictionaries" the unnamed narrator has created a dense language made of strange, often old-fashioned phrases and words that evoke the meanings, even if they aren't correct. The descriptions take some concentration to unravel. The plot follows a trip into the nearby town to find a "pine suit" to bury the father in, despite never having visited it. Some discoveries are made that change the narrator's world, before returning home to find brother has gone slowly insane. Many secrets are revealed as the pages fly by, so I don't want to delve into the plot too much more than that.
But the writing is so very odd. I don't know if it is brilliant or just showy, but I almost couldn't get past the first couple pages. Then I was so sucked into it, I couldn't stop. The heartbreaking conclusion makes it worth the difficulties you may encounter in the wild narrative style. I wouldn't recommend it to the casual reader, but Gaeten Soucy might be up your alley if you want something different.

Read This! "Love and Friendship" by Jane Austen

It's a slim little volume, just 87 pages. But avid readers of Jane Austen will eat up every page of "Love and Friendship" a collection of three apocryphal novella fragments collected by Hesperus Press. All three are written as a series of letters, with a forward by novelist and screenwriter Fay Weldon.

The first entry, "Love and Friendship" is a completed story. It's over the top melodrama non-stop, understandable since she wrote it at age fourteen, but definitely in a tongue-in-cheek manner. The tragic tale of young Laura, who meets, falls for and marries the son of a baronet in the space of about five minutes. The baronet does not approve of his new daughter-in-law, forcing misadventure upon the young couple and their friends. That is only the beginning, the tragedies pile up, as does the ridiculous coincidences that allow our heroine to travel all over England, fainting, meddling in private affairs and ultimately losing her husband and friend. The story is beyond ridiculous, but the sparkling wit and amusing conversation between characters that Jane would put to good use in masterpieces like "Pride & Prejudice" is on full display.

"The Three Sisters" is not finished, I think it would have ranked among Miss Austen's classics if it had. Mary Stanhope has been proposed to by a very boring, unattractive and slightly obnoxious man who has a modest amount of wealth. She doesn't want to accept, but eventually does in order to be the first among her sisters and friends to be married. She reminds me of Lydia Bennett a great deal. When she goes to gloat to her friends, she is introduced to a handsome newcomer. Oops, guess she should have waited! The story ends about there, but I have a feeling it would've been a good one.

The final piece is called "A Collection Of Letters" which describes it perfectly: five stories written as letters. The first is kind of boring, a mother tells of her girls introduction into society. The second involves a girl who has been dumped for reasons not mentioned, and is feeling it much harder than her prior misadventures in romance. She then converses with a older woman who tells her a tale of love taken by death. The third is vignette of another young girl whose frenemies take her to balls, only to make fun of her being less well off. It's kind of funny. Fourth is the awkward conversation between an very nosy young lady trying to learn the back story of a newcomer to the area. Last is a tale of star crossed lovers and their love notes. Each of them would fit perfectly into any of Jane Austen's stories: scenes with out context, but obviously well-written, well-paced and featuring Jane's impeccable sense of delight in love gone a little awry.

As a huge fan of Jane Austen's books, I found this collection delightful. If you don't like Jane Austen, or have read very little of her work, you may find it tedious and lacking in plot.

Read This! "Christ The Lord: Out Of Egypt" by Anne Rice

Almost anyone who knows the name Anne Rice knows it from her legendary vampire novels, especially "Interview With The Vampire." Her work has always been meticulously researched, and stunningly written. So when she chose to write about the most well know figure in the Western world, that it would be well-written and well-researched was a given fact. What I didn't expect was the rich passion and inspired thought that went into the novel "Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt."

Told from in the first person, from the perspective of a divine seven-year-old Jesus bar Joseph, the first century Middle East springs to life. Jesus doesn't understand his powers, does not yet know the story of his birth and the reason his family fled to Egypt. He is a smart child, a good child, but when he miraculously kills, then revives a child he is confused. Again when he heals his uncle, he doesn't know for sure that he was the one who did it. He doesn't know why his family has been hidden, why the strange reaction of the village people upon his family's return to Nazareth. On the way home, they stop in Jerusalem for Passover, and Jesus witnesses a riot, and watches as soldiers impale a man with spear. That scene replays in his head, especially during a feverish dream. The novel ends when Jesus begins to discover his destiny, and learns the truth about what happened in the sleepy town of Bethlehem.

While the story of the life of Christ is more than well known, Rice's novel colorfully depicts the life a carpenter's family in a small town in first century Judea, masterfully uncovers the emotions of a boy on the verge of discovering his Godhood and evokes true feelings in this reader. I can't wait to read the recently released second volume, "Christ The Lord: Road To Cana"