Trashy Thursdays will be happening every Thursday (duh) and will feature the trashy pop songs I kinda love. Don't get it twisted, I think pop music is an art form. But like all art, there are brilliant artistic works are fresh and dynamic and new as well as less inspired pieces of art. Sometimes those less inspired bits are as much fun as the "good" stuff, that's why we're getting trashy!
OK, I love me some divas. And Vanessa Williams is a goddess of feirceness with lovely vocal skills and decent acting chops. But can we talk about her post-Miss America scandal pop breakthrough? I love it so, it's one of my all time favorite songs. But the lyrics, especially on the chorus, are so laughable I have to call Trashy on it!
"Sometimes the snow comes down in June" OK, I'll give you that. Maybe you're in Australia. "Sometimes the sun goes round the moon" Yeah, I'm not a astronaut or anything but I'm pretty sure that's impossible. "Just when I thought our chance had passed, you go and save the best for last" Aww, it's sweet and a little resigned. Add in some seriously dramatic strings and a sad piano line underneath some seriously emotive vocals and it's a master class in cheesy pop balladry. Which is why I frakkin' love it!
But the video is pure early-1990s. The faux-fur coat, the sparkly champagne colored turtleneck with matching gold leggings, the nude shoulders shot tastefully in black-and-white, the string group playing under a projected video of Vanessa. It's "classy" - quotes included.
I hope no one thinks I dislike the song or Vanessa. I love this song, but I also understand it's kinda trashy. Enjoy it anyway...
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Dust Has Just Begun To Form Crop Circles In The Carpet...
Oh, people of the internets! I have failed you these last few months, and I do apologize for my lack of posts in the time I was nurturing my fledgling relationship with my new boyfriend. I still have him, and I've been trying to make time for work, blogging and a personal (read: hot sex) life.
But now a new wrinkle has formed - I am moving! It's just a few streets away, but the packing and moving is taking more time than I had assumed. It's been a while since I uprooted. Plus, I was dumb and agreed to lead (and create) a Bible study for church.
My personal situation is coming first for a few weeks instead of half-assing it here and in the "real world", but I am hoping no later than October 7th I will be back and ready for action. I'm going to preload some Trashy Thursdays to keep y'all entertained during the move, though. And when I come back I'll be shooting for at least one post each weekday and occasional weekend posts. We'll see! Anyway, stay tuned!
Just for shits & giggles: Boys, Boys, Boys...
But now a new wrinkle has formed - I am moving! It's just a few streets away, but the packing and moving is taking more time than I had assumed. It's been a while since I uprooted. Plus, I was dumb and agreed to lead (and create) a Bible study for church.
My personal situation is coming first for a few weeks instead of half-assing it here and in the "real world", but I am hoping no later than October 7th I will be back and ready for action. I'm going to preload some Trashy Thursdays to keep y'all entertained during the move, though. And when I come back I'll be shooting for at least one post each weekday and occasional weekend posts. We'll see! Anyway, stay tuned!
Just for shits & giggles: Boys, Boys, Boys...
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Trashy Thursday: Jump5 - "Spinning Around"
Trashy Thursdays will be happening every Thursday (duh) and will feature the trashy pop songs I kinda love. Don't get it twisted, I think pop music is an art form. But like all art, there are brilliant artistic works are fresh and dynamic and new as well as less inspired pieces of art. Sometimes those less inspired bits are as much fun as the "good" stuff, that's why we're getting trashy!
Back in the day, when I was a good boy who only listened to Christian music and attended church every time the doors were open, there was a Christian teen pop market. It was filled with wholesome alternatives to Britney and S Club 7 and a lot of it was pretty good. Racheal Lampa had a beautiful voice and Stacie Orrico was the funky girl-next-door who wrote piano ballads about friends with anorexia. But when a group of kids a couple years younger than myself joined forces for Jump5 (the gospel answer to S Club 7) even I knew it was gloriously trashy.
Of course, I was a closet case so I couldn't figure out why I thought Chris was so darn attractive. It's not as pervy as it sounds, he's only two years younger than me. OK, kinda pervy. But the song is pure cheese with a layer of smaltz (and braces!) Plus, the lyrics are vauge enough that parents would assume that God was the ones spinning them around, but I'm pretty sure the Disney Channel crowd assumed that it was some cute young thing turnin' it upside down. Either way, complete trash you need to see to believe!
If that's not trashy enough, here's a link to a cover of "Beauty & The Beast" from the DVD release of that Disney film.
Back in the day, when I was a good boy who only listened to Christian music and attended church every time the doors were open, there was a Christian teen pop market. It was filled with wholesome alternatives to Britney and S Club 7 and a lot of it was pretty good. Racheal Lampa had a beautiful voice and Stacie Orrico was the funky girl-next-door who wrote piano ballads about friends with anorexia. But when a group of kids a couple years younger than myself joined forces for Jump5 (the gospel answer to S Club 7) even I knew it was gloriously trashy.
Of course, I was a closet case so I couldn't figure out why I thought Chris was so darn attractive. It's not as pervy as it sounds, he's only two years younger than me. OK, kinda pervy. But the song is pure cheese with a layer of smaltz (and braces!) Plus, the lyrics are vauge enough that parents would assume that God was the ones spinning them around, but I'm pretty sure the Disney Channel crowd assumed that it was some cute young thing turnin' it upside down. Either way, complete trash you need to see to believe!
If that's not trashy enough, here's a link to a cover of "Beauty & The Beast" from the DVD release of that Disney film.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
American Idols Rocked The House In Reading, PA
If you are an Idol fanatic, you know that watching the show just isn't enough. You need more. You need YouTube clips of Clay Aiken singing in school and homemade t-shirts declaring you allegiance to Glambert Nation. And you know that when the American Idols Live tour hits a town near you, you will sell your soul for tickets.
Because the Idols Live is insanity. It just is. We sat behind a crazed fan who brought printouts of photos blended with a scrapbooking program to create glorious Adam Lambert collages involving the words "ring of fire." She was hoping to run into the Glamorous One, and we sat in the seats where that could of happened!
Beside the seats we were in, there was a curtained doorway with a metal gate. Before the show even started Matt Giraraud (the faux-Timberlake guy) popped through the curtain wearing a fake mustache and eyebrows. The one girl in the group in front of us managed to get a picture with him and promptly broke into weeping and shaky texting. Major fan craziness!
Throughout the show, Alison Iraheta popped her adorable little face through. I waved like a four-year-old meeting Mickey Mouse. Micheal Sarver also kept peeking through, who has lost some weight and gotten even roughneckedly hotter. And Crazy Glambert Grandma claims to have caught a glimpse of my sworn enemy/doppelganger The Gokey through the edge of the curtain. Basically the best seats in the house.
We were also somewhat close to the stage, where the real reason we came was happening. The show counted down the contestants in order of vote-offs, so we started at number ten, Micheal. Like I said, looking very hot. He sang two songs, Gavin DeGraw's "In Love With A Girl" which was hot and NE-YO's "Closer" which was decent. He also frequently commanded he crowd to make some noise, which got a little annoying.
Megan Joy followed, her hot pink dress and heels made her look like Tattoo Barbie. She also performed two numbers, "Put Your Records On" which was really good and Amy Winehouse's "Tears Dry On Their Own" which had the f-word redacted. Both suited her unusual way of vocalizing, and I was pleased to see her for once.
After Megan sauntered offstage, Scott McIntyre rose from the floor at the piano to perform. It was a dramatic way to enter, and his version of "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton was stellar.
Lil Rounds had one of the hottest video openers, her picture was reflected in her sunglasses. She did a Mary J medley that was smoking, her shoes were on fire. She followed that with "No One" by Alicia Keys and did a very good job also. Closing with Beyonce's "Single Ladies" she told the crowd she worked with the original choreographer for the performance, which led to a major letdown. It was really basic movements, I wouldn't even call it dancing. But her vocals were amazing and that's what counts!
Anoop then rose from the floor to perform his heartrending version of "You Were Always On My Mind" followed by another ballad before closing with a crowd-pleasing "My Perogative." He is a showman, working a stand-still behind the mic for "On My Mind" and really rocking the stage the rest of the set.
Matt Giraurd, pegged all season as a smooth r&b man and blasted by the judges every time he strayed from that sound, opened with The Black Crowes "Hard To Handle" and rocked the fuck out of it. He slipped behind the piano after that for "Georgia On My Mind" and The Fray's "You Found Me" - another song disliked by the judges but loved by fans like me. I think it was a bit of an F-You to Randy and Kara, and I heartily approve.
All the Idols that had already performed returned to the stage in a variety of combinations (including Scott and Matt on dueling pianos!) which was capped with all six doing The Four Seasons' "Beggin'" which was soulful and beautiful.
After an intermission, Alison took the stage. She opened with Pink's "So What" which fit perfectly into her wheelhouse. She followed it with Janis Joplin's "Cry Baby" and Heart's "Barracuda." She picked songs that worked well with her rough yet soaring voice.
Then came Gokey. I promised not to be rude when he came out, and since he came out with the only one of his performances I didn't hate I didn't. He opened with "P.Y.T." from Micheal Jackson night and did it well. Then he destroyed Santana's "Maria, Maria" with a awful, horrible attempt at Latin dancing. At some point, he straddled his mic stand like a male stripper and ripped off his jacket. Yeah, "role model." He followed that with a pair of trite Rascall Flatts jams, with a moment for him to spout off about going through hard times and being yourself and blah-blah-blah. So over him...
BECAUSE IT WAS TIME FOR GLAMBERT!!!!!! Adam roared like a mighty train of rock as he pummeled the stage during "Whole Lotta Love." He wanted to give us every inch of his love and just bent us over and did just that. He followed that with Muse's "Starlight" which he sang in a higher register than I've heard him do before. He also reprised "Mad World" and brought Alison onstage for their Foghat duet. I though that was the end, but no. He launched into a David Bowie medley, starting with "Life On Mars" and "Fame" before tearing the shit out of "Let's Dance." During the course of the medley he lost his jacket and picked up some hip gyrations that just screamed electric sex. It was epic!
I was concerned that Kris Allen, this year's winner, would be a letdown after all that showboating. But he opened with his revelatory "Heartless" from top three week. He added more instruments from the live TV version, but not the sleepy lounge sounds of the iTunes studio version. Rock guitars swelled on the chorus, as well a violins. It was massive and perfect for an arena tour. He actually skipped his coronation single to do The Killer's "All These Things That I've Done" which rocked really hard. I didn't expect that from him. When I saw the piano rise behind him, I knew it was time to weep. Kris pulled no punches on his stellar take on "Ain't No Sunshine" and it felt so much more powerful live and in full. After that, he slipped a little with Matchbox 20's "Bright Lights" and the overplayed Beatles classic "Hey Jude."
The rest of the Idols joined him at the end of "Hey Jude" and then rocked out on "Don't Stop Believin'" It was the perfect song to end the night, and after three hours I was never gonna stop.
Because the Idols Live is insanity. It just is. We sat behind a crazed fan who brought printouts of photos blended with a scrapbooking program to create glorious Adam Lambert collages involving the words "ring of fire." She was hoping to run into the Glamorous One, and we sat in the seats where that could of happened!
Beside the seats we were in, there was a curtained doorway with a metal gate. Before the show even started Matt Giraraud (the faux-Timberlake guy) popped through the curtain wearing a fake mustache and eyebrows. The one girl in the group in front of us managed to get a picture with him and promptly broke into weeping and shaky texting. Major fan craziness!
Throughout the show, Alison Iraheta popped her adorable little face through. I waved like a four-year-old meeting Mickey Mouse. Micheal Sarver also kept peeking through, who has lost some weight and gotten even roughneckedly hotter. And Crazy Glambert Grandma claims to have caught a glimpse of my sworn enemy/doppelganger The Gokey through the edge of the curtain. Basically the best seats in the house.
We were also somewhat close to the stage, where the real reason we came was happening. The show counted down the contestants in order of vote-offs, so we started at number ten, Micheal. Like I said, looking very hot. He sang two songs, Gavin DeGraw's "In Love With A Girl" which was hot and NE-YO's "Closer" which was decent. He also frequently commanded he crowd to make some noise, which got a little annoying.
Megan Joy followed, her hot pink dress and heels made her look like Tattoo Barbie. She also performed two numbers, "Put Your Records On" which was really good and Amy Winehouse's "Tears Dry On Their Own" which had the f-word redacted. Both suited her unusual way of vocalizing, and I was pleased to see her for once.
After Megan sauntered offstage, Scott McIntyre rose from the floor at the piano to perform. It was a dramatic way to enter, and his version of "A Thousand Miles" by Vanessa Carlton was stellar.
Lil Rounds had one of the hottest video openers, her picture was reflected in her sunglasses. She did a Mary J medley that was smoking, her shoes were on fire. She followed that with "No One" by Alicia Keys and did a very good job also. Closing with Beyonce's "Single Ladies" she told the crowd she worked with the original choreographer for the performance, which led to a major letdown. It was really basic movements, I wouldn't even call it dancing. But her vocals were amazing and that's what counts!
Anoop then rose from the floor to perform his heartrending version of "You Were Always On My Mind" followed by another ballad before closing with a crowd-pleasing "My Perogative." He is a showman, working a stand-still behind the mic for "On My Mind" and really rocking the stage the rest of the set.
Matt Giraurd, pegged all season as a smooth r&b man and blasted by the judges every time he strayed from that sound, opened with The Black Crowes "Hard To Handle" and rocked the fuck out of it. He slipped behind the piano after that for "Georgia On My Mind" and The Fray's "You Found Me" - another song disliked by the judges but loved by fans like me. I think it was a bit of an F-You to Randy and Kara, and I heartily approve.
All the Idols that had already performed returned to the stage in a variety of combinations (including Scott and Matt on dueling pianos!) which was capped with all six doing The Four Seasons' "Beggin'" which was soulful and beautiful.
After an intermission, Alison took the stage. She opened with Pink's "So What" which fit perfectly into her wheelhouse. She followed it with Janis Joplin's "Cry Baby" and Heart's "Barracuda." She picked songs that worked well with her rough yet soaring voice.
Then came Gokey. I promised not to be rude when he came out, and since he came out with the only one of his performances I didn't hate I didn't. He opened with "P.Y.T." from Micheal Jackson night and did it well. Then he destroyed Santana's "Maria, Maria" with a awful, horrible attempt at Latin dancing. At some point, he straddled his mic stand like a male stripper and ripped off his jacket. Yeah, "role model." He followed that with a pair of trite Rascall Flatts jams, with a moment for him to spout off about going through hard times and being yourself and blah-blah-blah. So over him...
BECAUSE IT WAS TIME FOR GLAMBERT!!!!!! Adam roared like a mighty train of rock as he pummeled the stage during "Whole Lotta Love." He wanted to give us every inch of his love and just bent us over and did just that. He followed that with Muse's "Starlight" which he sang in a higher register than I've heard him do before. He also reprised "Mad World" and brought Alison onstage for their Foghat duet. I though that was the end, but no. He launched into a David Bowie medley, starting with "Life On Mars" and "Fame" before tearing the shit out of "Let's Dance." During the course of the medley he lost his jacket and picked up some hip gyrations that just screamed electric sex. It was epic!
I was concerned that Kris Allen, this year's winner, would be a letdown after all that showboating. But he opened with his revelatory "Heartless" from top three week. He added more instruments from the live TV version, but not the sleepy lounge sounds of the iTunes studio version. Rock guitars swelled on the chorus, as well a violins. It was massive and perfect for an arena tour. He actually skipped his coronation single to do The Killer's "All These Things That I've Done" which rocked really hard. I didn't expect that from him. When I saw the piano rise behind him, I knew it was time to weep. Kris pulled no punches on his stellar take on "Ain't No Sunshine" and it felt so much more powerful live and in full. After that, he slipped a little with Matchbox 20's "Bright Lights" and the overplayed Beatles classic "Hey Jude."
The rest of the Idols joined him at the end of "Hey Jude" and then rocked out on "Don't Stop Believin'" It was the perfect song to end the night, and after three hours I was never gonna stop.
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
American Idols LIVE Tonight!
It's happening, people. I know I haven't been hyping it like I usually do with these kinds of events, but I will be in Reading, PA watching Kris, Glambert, Alison, Gokey (eww!) and the rest of the American Idols tonight! Watch for text posts through out the night!!!
Review: David Guetta - "One Love"
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The press release calls David Guetta's second album "genre-busting" and it's hard to argue with that. You can call it pop music, but in reality it's an amalgam of techno, hip-hop, pop, gospel and rock - which is what makes One Love a perfect pop disc.
Lead single "When Love Takes Over" features Kelly Rowland, acting as a muse of sorts. That song is simply devine, a perfect summery pop confection with diva vocals and a great beat. The Destiny's Child member appears on two other tracks, including a hi-NRG duet with NE-YO called "Choose." Also triple-hitting is Will.I.Am who appears solo, with fellow Black Eyed Pea Apl De Ap and with the whole gang on a remix of the Guetta-produced chart-topper "I Gotta Feeling." "I Wanna Go Crazy" is heavy techno with a spunky hook of "I wanna celebrate life with a Suicide Girl."
The title track, featuring Estelle, is brilliant. A mesmerizing blend of techno and gospel choirs, "One Love" is a true stand-out. Akon guests on "Sexy Bitch" and David Guetta does the impossible - makes his voice palatable. The lyrics are quite funny, also.
In reality, this is fun party album with a lot of great dance music. I really recommend it.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Sugababes "Get Sexy", Sample Right Said Fred
I know, it seems like every non-Madonna post this week has featured a sample. That's cause it did. I don't know if the music world is that lazy, or if we have literally run out of words and sounds and have no choice but to recycle songs. Al Gore probably approves.
Anyway, skankalicious British girl-group Sugababes have been burning up the charts in the UK for years, but US audiences have been denied their charms. Until now. Jay-Z's Roc Nation label is releasing their new disc Sweet 7 in the US and the first single is "Get Sexy."
It's a crazy club banger that reminds me of Kevin Rudolf's "Let It Rock" until the chorus goes all Right Said Fred. The trio use the melody and lyric structure from one of the most ridiculous one-hit wonders off all time, "I'm Too Sexy" and I think it works in a very trashy kind of way. I course, my taste level has always been suspect so you should totally watch and let me know...
Anyway, skankalicious British girl-group Sugababes have been burning up the charts in the UK for years, but US audiences have been denied their charms. Until now. Jay-Z's Roc Nation label is releasing their new disc Sweet 7 in the US and the first single is "Get Sexy."
It's a crazy club banger that reminds me of Kevin Rudolf's "Let It Rock" until the chorus goes all Right Said Fred. The trio use the melody and lyric structure from one of the most ridiculous one-hit wonders off all time, "I'm Too Sexy" and I think it works in a very trashy kind of way. I course, my taste level has always been suspect so you should totally watch and let me know...
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Trashy Thursday: Vanessa Hudgens - "Come Back To Me"
Trashy Thursdays will be happening every Thursday (duh) and will feature the trashy pop songs I kinda love. Don't get it twisted, I think pop music is an art form. But like all art, there are brilliant artistic works are fresh and dynamic and new as well as less inspired pieces of art. Sometimes those less inspired bits are as much fun as the "good" stuff, that's why we're getting trashy!
You may know Vanessa Hudgens from the High School Musical series of films for Disney. Or you may know her from her inability to keep her clothes on while texting pictures to her guyfriends. Either way, you should know her from her ridiculously trashy single "Come Back To Me."
In this bouncy string-laden hip-pop confection, "Baby V" samples the Player smooth rock/soul classic "Baby Come Back" to open the chorus and play behind her own verses. It works really well in context, for one it isn't the backbone of the song, just a vocal flourish. And the beat is really kinda fun, just because the girl doesn't have a fabulous voice doesn't mean she can't give us a fabulously trashy song.
The video is so basic, but I love the bit when she's dancing under the blinking chandeliers. I want a room full of blinking chandeliers!
You may know Vanessa Hudgens from the High School Musical series of films for Disney. Or you may know her from her inability to keep her clothes on while texting pictures to her guyfriends. Either way, you should know her from her ridiculously trashy single "Come Back To Me."
In this bouncy string-laden hip-pop confection, "Baby V" samples the Player smooth rock/soul classic "Baby Come Back" to open the chorus and play behind her own verses. It works really well in context, for one it isn't the backbone of the song, just a vocal flourish. And the beat is really kinda fun, just because the girl doesn't have a fabulous voice doesn't mean she can't give us a fabulously trashy song.
The video is so basic, but I love the bit when she's dancing under the blinking chandeliers. I want a room full of blinking chandeliers!
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
ZOMG! The New Madonna Video Is Free On iTunes! (Until Tomorrow)
Run, don't walk. Get thee to a nunnery and borrow their PC to download Madonna's "Celebration" video from iTunes for free. It's far from her best video, but it's a really cool dance-centric clip featuring Madge in t
high-high boots (fucking hot!) and a rhinestone cover dress that looks almost age appropriate yet very sexy.Madonna's daughter, Lourdes, also appears briefly towards the end of the video. Dancing in a colorful tank and black leggings, she proves she may have the dancing chops to follow in her mom's footsteps one day. She does a back flip at the 3:15 mark, it's really awesome. Madonna also enlists a multi-racial group of dancers to get really crazy with high kicks and flips and break dancing. It's the most fun I've seen the Material Mom have since Music. The embed below probably won't last long, but you can watch below:
That's not all, kiddies! Apparently there will be a second video for the single, which also features Lourdes Maria Ciccone Leon - this time in full-on "Like A Virgin" garb. It almost brought a tear to my eye to see her looking so much like her mom in this leaked pic:
With genes like that, how can't she be a star? Although, based on her impeccable fashion sense, I could see her in design before singing.
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
More Sampling: Jason DeRulo Samples Imogen Heap
Do you know who JR Rotem is? He's a sleazy hip-hop-flavored pop producer who is responsible for the crime against humanity that is Sean Kingston's career. But he's also given us Rihanna's hot "S.O.S." and Leona Lewis's "Better In Time" so I can't hate totally. He also claimed in an interveiw with Blender to have banged Britney Spears "wheelbarrow-style." We're back to hating him. Unless...
His newest production is a hip-hop jam by new artist Jason DeRulo which features a chorus lifted straight from Imogen Heap's The O.C.-soundtracking song "Hide & Seek". It's an interesting song to sample, the vocals were sped up to create a really different and unique sound. The rest of the song has a really earnest vocal, which helps offset my initial concerns about the sample being the only good part (ala Flo Rida's "Right Round") and the lyrics from the sample are worked into the rest of the song. In the end, after much debate, I think I like it. Listen:
His newest production is a hip-hop jam by new artist Jason DeRulo which features a chorus lifted straight from Imogen Heap's The O.C.-soundtracking song "Hide & Seek". It's an interesting song to sample, the vocals were sped up to create a really different and unique sound. The rest of the song has a really earnest vocal, which helps offset my initial concerns about the sample being the only good part (ala Flo Rida's "Right Round") and the lyrics from the sample are worked into the rest of the song. In the end, after much debate, I think I like it. Listen:
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