Jesus Loves This Guy!

A few weeks ago I was at the Salvation Army Store, which is a place I love to shop. I don't always have the best luck in finding clothes there that my three essential categories: stylish, fit well and in good shape. But that doesn't stop me from checking it out. This time I stumbled across a green T-shirt by Local Celebrity, which you can find in the mall stores for like $20, for just $2.99. The color of my shirt is a bit brighter green, but it's the same screen-printed design as the one at left. I wore it to Aunt Tina's house the next Saturday for her Independence Day picnic and the Linglestown fireworks. My cousin's fierce girlfriend Shannan popped in to watch the fireworks, she was among the many to comment on my hot new sartorial acquisition. Her comment though, though I know was in jest, was thought provoking: "But I thought Jesus hated gays?"

Does Jesus hate gays? Certain churches certainly have made headlines by asserting that claim, and I'm not convinced that many Christians don't believe it, too. I was never convinced that it was true, though. "God is Love" it says in the first Book Of John. Even if gay sex is a sin, even if that act of being romantically interested a member of the same sex is a sin, that doesn't stop God from loving me. It had taken me a long time to feel comfortable with accepting the dual personalities that, at first blush, appear to battle within me. Was I a Christian, and a gay man? Is such a thing possible?

It wasn't until I read a book called The Unauthorized Guide To Sex And The Church that I realized that it was both possible and is what I am. In the book, author Carmen Renee Berry explores all sides of the issues surrounding sex; hetero, homo, rape, abortion and a host of other issues that Christian struggle with. In her chapter on "Same-Sex Sex" she goes over the differing opinions on what the verses of the Bible mean in relation to homosexuality. In addition to the traditional interpretations of biblical passages, a more in depth look reveals the original intent. These opinions were ones never offered to me in my churches growing up. For example, the sin of Sodom is not homosexuality, it's rape and inhospitality. The verses from Leviticus prohibiting laying down "with a man as you would a woman" come from the same pre-Christian laws that don't allow mixed fabrics and shellfish. The "list of wickedness" from 1 Corinthians that include homosexual activities could not refer to monogamous committed relationships, because such a thing didn't exist in ancient time, so a word for them doesn't even exist in Greek. I know, you may think I'm bending scripture to justify myself, but if you just look at it with fresh eyes; not eyes clouded by years of being told what is right and what isn't based on prejudiced readings; you may find it, too.

Anyway, finally understanding that I am, as Degarmo & Key once sang, accepted by the one that matters most, I was in search of a church who would accept me the same way. I talked to my therapist, she recommended a church that is also mention the Unauthorized Guide, the Metropolitan Christian Church of the Spirit. Which is why Shannan's comment was as timely as it was thought provoking, I had decided to attend Sunday morning services the next day, for the first time in probably four or five years. It was a small crowd, since many were on camping trips and vacations for the holiday weekend. But the pastor welcomed me very warmly, she also asked a couple of those attending to introduce me to others as they came in. I don't remember any one's names, but that didn't matter. The worship was lively, the sermon was totally Bible-based, none of this new agey pop-psychology sermonizing that one might expect from a modern denomination. I didn't take communion, I wasn't sure I had really gotten myself right with God in my heart, even though I had convinced my head. I went again this morning, and really feel like I found a church that really meets me where I am. I'm really excited to finally water the plant in my soul that I had allowed to wither during my years of soul-searching. Perhaps I'm finally home?